Disclosure

I wonder why I did not think of writing about this earlier! Anyway, I guess it would be a welcome variation, to some extent at least, when I decided to voluntarily ‘disclose’ a close weakness of mine. No.. no… it is not a weakness that incapacitates me in anyway. (Perhaps, I feel that we need not always look at all ‘weaknesses’ as some kind of affliction, necessarily very detrimental to health, physical or mental). This weakness of mine happens to give me (‘bestow me with’ would be more sacred way of putting it!) some unfair advantage over others! Mysteriously enough, it never became an addiction!

I love to play carroms. It is still a weakness, though it is years since I came anywhere near a carrom board. That is the advantage of having just a weakness, not an addiction!

Honestly, I still don’t know who ‘started’ this carroms. I am not sure whether it got invented, or it was first ‘discovered’ and then got modified. Because, it is just a game of ‘billiards’, minus a 180 degrees of aim while ‘shooting’. Somehow, it is very popular in India, throughout. But it never really got the status it deserves, commensurate with its popularity. It is almost like those honest people, who invariably go unnoticed, though it is they who collectively keep the country ‘going’ despite all types of obstacles which flourishes liberally. But it is not entirely without any reward. In fact the reward that these honest people enjoy is a bit mystic and utterly subtle too.

I look at this game as a sort of ‘guru’, a guide, a friend, a good critic, and also as a very good ‘informer’! The other players seem like an open book, the moment they get involved into the game. The nature of their mind seems quite easy to grasp (the contents of the mind was never of any use or interest to me, and it does remain unknown too). For me, this game is like a handy measuring tool, or a ‘monitor’ that can be used to test my ‘mental’ balance. When the mind is relaxed, steady, and alert, the game is almost mine, irrespective of how well matched the opponent is. On the other hand, when the mind is unsteady, turbulent, etc, even a simple and easy coin seems an uphill task to deal with! The value of ‘practice’ became too obvious, and it was directly proportional to the tolerance level of deftly handling the game with an emotionally shaky mind of that day! The board seemed a clear mirror of my own state of mind, when I dealt with the game. I felt quite surprised that the rules of the game looked quite familiar to me, (it was just the same as ‘I had felt it ought to be’, long before the ‘standardized’ rules was shown to me later, at ‘tournament’ levels!). It is the love for the game that took me into deep concepts about the ‘ethics’ of a ‘level playing field’. Since this game combines the factors of luck, skill, logic, judgment, and specifically, an emotional balance, with all these in a blend of a wonderful proportion, the rules and the administrator of it, calls for an excellent grasp on Jurisprudence. Now, this might seem too far fetched, an imaginative argument! But, let me state a typical example. Once it so happened that I got ‘caught up’ into participating into an inter-offices-tournament at a district headquarters. I got the warning to stay away from that ‘set’ of participants a bit too late. (A few decades ago, hockey was played at international levels between two particular rival countries thus. The sticks were used more to injure the opponent than to hit the ball!). Within a few rounds, situation became too difficult for me to play, and I walked off (giving a ‘walkover’, in the middle of the game). It so happened, that the chief organizer felt guilty, and nursed a secret desire to somehow compensate me. He ensured that I attend the prize giving ceremony, persuading me with reassurance that it would just a symbolic show of sportsman-spirit, to attend. Reluctantly, I obliged him. There, he made a surprise announcement of an award in my favor for an ‘all round performance’, and he quoted appropriate skills displayed, which did stand on its merits. But, the other prize winners who knew the underlying significance revolted instantly, and took shelter under the ‘concept of strictness of purpose’. They argued that this chief organizer’s act of awarding me an ‘unscheduled’ prize would tantamount to ‘misuse’ of funds allocated for ‘prizes’ (as decided by ‘committee’)! I was standing there facing the audience, thoroughly embarrassed. I did not even look at the chief guest and others, despite the curiosity to observe their ‘reaction’. But the chief guest (a cabinet minister of the state) ‘responded’ instead of ‘reacting’ sporadically. He calmly got hold of the mike, invoked his ministerial rank, powers, and ability to ask the ‘aide-de-camp’ in case of need, and then made an announcement that baffled me! He instantly touched the core principles of jurisprudence, justified the need for recognition of skill and the award, and decided to circumvent the allegation of ‘misuse’ of funds, by bearing the cost of the ‘prize and the official photograph’ all by himself, out of his private personal money! In those few moments, I learnt many a precious lessons, including those about principles of equity and judicious use of discretion! (Never thereafter did I lack that watchfulness to ‘lookout’ for trouble of such kind, and used to gracefully allow the opponent to win, when such times arose. My gain was enormous, compared to the pittance in the form of a prize that gets forgotten too soon, in view of the status accorded to the game itself!).

I got pushed into this game at a very early age. My father was no exception to a sense of loyalty to the ‘ethnicity’ of the native village where he grew into adulthood. This sense of ‘loyalty’ towards the ‘ethnicity’ is a bit unique to those who hail from that state! The uniqueness lies in their refusal to budge from a few of their ethnic traits. For instance, people from non-English speaking countries struggle to catch the correct accent of English due to the ‘impact’ of their own native tongue. But this unique set of people simply ‘refuse’ to adapt themselves to the correct accent though it is very easy for them due to their pre-existing skill with the tongue twisting nature of their own native language, and its lean, being mostly on Sanskrit, a language that is known to bestow multi-dimensional benefits! So, such people, who share similar loyalty, also like to preserve their harmless eccentricity, join up and form a group, and also find a relaxation right in the midst of their own homogenous kind, where they tense up between themselves over trifles, which are mostly due to slight mismatch of levels of their very same ‘unique’ stamp-marks of ethnic traits! Yes, I used to wonder as a kid, what was the ‘nature’ of relaxation they would be(better to say, they “might be”) drawing, out of such brawls which reach high crescendos of noise when they are really tensed up, even if it all about just a game of cards or carroms! I was taken to the regular meeting place of this association ‘office’ right after the school in the evening, simply because my father chose not to waste the travel time to drop me home and then join up the ‘session’ of evening round of game. I cannot really blame my father or the situation for my ‘weakness’ that crept in. It is almost a family weakness, ethnic weakness, state weakness, and perhaps country’s weakness to try out one’s fingers at this game of carroms! Almost every household with some modest means would provide a carrom board for the entertainment of their kids. Quite inadvertently, I acquired good skills at the game of carroms, when I kept fiddling with the coins, trying to knock them into the pocket during brief intervals when elders discussed the previous game. I had the unfair advantage of an uncluttered mind of a kid, and all I did was “when you want to shoot, shoot, don’t talk” (That punch dialogue of old English movie “Good Bad, and the Ugly”). I even participated in a tournament, and was thrown out of the event, when somebody pointed out that I was a kid, and hence a ‘non-member’ of the association (membership was only for 18 years old and above), and hence ineligible for a prize. This was when I reached too close to winning a final game of doubles, with an expert, who chose me partner! (My first taste of ‘victimization’ for no fault of mine! Now you know, how much this game has taught me, the way nature does, when they say, ‘nature is the best teacher’!).
Psn(24th November, 2010)