Mannerly Mannerisms

Jab dil aaye Gadhi pe toh Pari kya cheez hai...

जब दिल आये गधी पे तो परी क्या चीज़ है ....

The few opening scenes of a movie turns the other cheek of a beautiful woman into a disfigured ugly one, abruptly revealed to the audience (through the eyes of the hero, of course), to see whether the perception can reach deeper than the fire-charred skin, and manage to yet find some appreciation!... (Of course, we also can 'see' that the heroine has a 'future' at stake, and so that the audience do not end up being reminded too much, of the ugly make up, .... there is a compromise that the other side will not be focused upon too much by the camera... The audience in general, doesn't have to 'love the rubbish' for too long!)...

I got a feel of how anxious/restless a kid feels, when he prays, that the question paper in his hands when opened, contains only 'that-which-he-has read-well' (he omitted too many 'portions' out of 'portions' prescribed by the teacher)... I too started 'wishing' ... something like this: “may that great voice of Ameen Sayani ji, belong to a matching-graceful-face”... And to me, it did! It sounded like an echo of... “bataa teri raza kya hai” (what is thy wish, for it is thine that will prevail)...

I had an aunt who was of a nondescript type of personality... She was not approved of by any of political parties of our family women folk, and was dismissed as 'just a so-so' lady.. The moment a new lady joins the family, there is an anxiety to find out which party she would join, to do family-politics...

This lady was down-to-earth simple... She did the routine quite well... Spoke rarely.. When the first child came forth, people noticed something queerish !! The kid used to spend his play time with almost any body around the house, very cheerfully, right at the age from one to 5... But every two hours, he would just run to his mother, take a look at her, and come back soon! She on her part, would struggle to get him to eat his 'timely' food.. he keeps running away from her, especially when she is after him! This lady was never a topic even, during the discussions... Her children now, miss her very badly (all are adults, and she died a little too early)...

Mannerisms!

Once the child starts getting used to looking-out for mannerisms, even the perception level provided by nature for self-preservation drops down to 'going only by the looks' of a person!.. It is a struggle, if somebody even tries to see beyond the skin level! Where to begin, and what to look for is itself an elusive search! We try to remember somebody... and it is the 'set of mannerisms' that rush to form a visual-picture into our imagination...

We do not even try to look at 'why we seem-to-miss a person more when away, but repel at the very sight of that person, in a few moments!...

Often the person gets all the appreciation soon after the person has earned the title 'Late'--Mr/Ms !... Usually, titles are conferred after meriting an appreciation!

A commercial guru builds up his reputation, and strives to retain it on the 'edifice of the mannerism ' that he carefully 'maintains' visibly to continue to impress his victims!.. (Tours help to prevent discovering too much.. darshan after a gap of time, only serves to 'match' the image already formed, so..  no risk at all!

There are great beings, who simply hover over, to obviate the very hurdle of this 'mannerism mask' from preventing the deeper connectivity with the being they are after!

Most compassionate teachers wait, till the student feels fatigued at the mannerisms of the teacher, and then disengages the mind even from the subtle mannerisms that words and scriptures present, and pushes over the student beyond ... to experience the concepts, its values, and if needed , for a while 'with' the being of that teacher himself.. (yes only if needed, and only for a while !)

(At a forum like this... we have an expanded choice... practice looking at the words... then its contents... then the mind, its beauty/ugliness/whatever... the 'being' alone..... taking advantage of the conspicuous absence of the 'persona-in-person that we are so used to...

Or ..... try, innovate, create and impose a new 'set of mannerisms' to suit the format of the forum, to continue our real-life games, in a virtual-meeting-world too!

While there is a noticeable effort in trying to get to 'know' a person beyond the 'mannerisms' during an 'alliance-matching/match-fixing... the popular turf has turned into a virtual meeting place now... posing a greater challenge, demanding finer-skills, and yes, offering wider range-of-choice... where endless chatting seems to get people into “no-where”... when the seeking is to see everything happen is at 'now-and-here'!!! ..

Meanwhile, the bulk of the selectivity criteria of a 'good-student' is fully-automated, outsourced to a dumb gadget... so no mis-understanding issues, when the very basis of an understanding is demolished! Na rahe baans, na baje baansuri...!!!)

Immaculately yours,

psn(21st January, 2014)