Nervous Relaxant...

I k-n-o-w, .... 'nerve-relaxant' would sound more appropriate...!

But it is our 'concern' about being appropriate too often than needed, is .... what is getting nervous!

What we intend to use as a 'relaxant', as a kind of 'anticipatory-bail' for any possible nerve-arrest, leading to various dis-orders within, when the outer-orderliness is under a threat!

Even as a kid, I used to be intrigued, when I find that the opening dialogues after the 'namaskar-chamatkar' etc used to be about climate... If the remark about the climate gets a unanimous vote or a 'general-consensus', then they take courage to mention their opinion about the weather...

Then comes the contentious 'issues' like individual health... which has to be dealt very very carefully! The use of very safe words, like 'looking litte-bright'... little-(pause... look for tell-tale anxiety symptoms).. then add—dull/weak/pulled down/etc...

Arey! Coming down on an annual visit, spending precious time and money, are we going to discuss only 'non-controversial-issues' like climate, weather, and other things, which are actually better-understood-than-the-humans, by even animals, birds, insects etc? Endless discussions about weather has not made any one better or smart, as to take an umbrella on the 'right-day'....

Some day, when I grow up perhaps , ... I said to myself... (the size of the brain would grow proportionately, and thus would accommodate more data for 'proper-analysis-perhaps'.. etc), and then I would find out the 'why' of such 'safe-topics' being discussed too-often!

When I crossed that age, where a 'physical-punishment' is going to be far-unlikely... I experimented with dialogues like, 'Your bathroom feels a little slippery' and then wait... !!! There is an insurance-policy 'ready' and handy.. just in case of need... (I don't subscribe for anticipatory-bail.. Karma theory doesn't tolerate such bail-applications, ever! If somebody 'still-persists' the future judgements are 'including-costs'!). So, I 'wait'... The usual response is either an 'excuse or a lament' . The 'excuse' is when there is no one else around to pass the buck(the blame).. The lament is when somebody-else can be nailed... A few are not interested in 'relaxant' software, and they boil-down on me... that is when the 'insurance-policy' comes handy, and I say, “Oh! Now I recollect.. my underfoot was oily, and the bathroom floor was wet... and so 'it' must have slipped!” (The heavy insulating clause of this insurance policy is in 'it' (literally too!).. If I say, “I slipped” or even a dilute form of it, 'my-foot-slipped'... my own 'relaxant' is going to become 'nervous'!... Yep!!! The 'pronouns' come handy for an escape from a blame-game... The 'cup slipped' (I was 'never-never' careless about 'handling the cup'..!).. But, the lottery ticket never had won by 'itself'! I won it!...

Thus, I discovered... when people meet.. only the 'apprehensive-minds' meet, nobody-else(within those people)!.. My discovery could be wrong!.. They why is it that when kids meet, they come close too-fast? Emotions-meet?.. Yep! With adults, it is either the logically-apprehensive-minds, or the negatively-apprehensive-emotions (exceptions 'over-ruled', by your-Honour!... Judge-wala-honour, or the 'honour' we carry somewhere inside us .. dunno, where it is exactly safe-deposited-in-locker within... but we know, we carry some 'honour'.. don't ever allow others to touch it!)...

The further 'complexities' that the simplicity--of 'non-controversial-topics' which 'seemed' to favour us too often, and had managed to hide within—got revealed only when I had opted to volunteer for intense programs of spiritual nature! That is when I tried to coin a phrase for my 'private and personal reference' : 'Simplicity is not always bereft of its complexity'...

This compulsiveness to insulate the 'ground-realities', using the 'non-controversials' to deliberately camouflage the surge of revulsion, thus treating the non-controversial as a 'relaxant' for both-sides, ... I try to guess... that it might create some kind of accumulated negative-residue, deep within... and ...either.... it erupts like a volcano, when somebody counters a 'non-controversial-dialogue' with a 'provocative-one'.. or .. it slowly takes a toll of the nervous-system, like a silent destroyer of some vital organ, and then turns into a silent killer, over a period of time! The span extends over too large a period of time, and hence remains elusive to a close scrutiny.. But I guess, medical science too is on the look out for 'specialists' in large numbers in the field of “Psychoneuroimmunology”...

Be it as it may... But, what about a progress on spiritual path, with this kind of a mind, which has 'defaulted' itself, to function a bit 'non-controversially' all the time? How is it going to recognise the mile-stones? It is either 'excessive-humility' or a 'stout-refusal' to accept the 'real-weather/climate' within!!!

On a forum, be it for a spirited-spirituality-even... it is about 'fair-weather-friends'... and so, it is so safe to copy paste 'standard-stuff'.. and insist on a 'standard' non-controversial comment/response! (there is no dearth for a variety of stuff, waiting to be copy pasted!)... Our 'immunity-system' works so flawlessly ... when it is about 'proverbs, adages, ... why, even those spiritual concepts!' Oh! It is a real challenge now, for a 'genuine-spiritual-teacher' to try to make some dent, into such an immunity system, even if it means .. about using some kind of virus, bug, or such unconventional tools/techniques!

Controversially yours,

psn(1st of the October, in 2014)

Heart Condition!

That is when the heart is not 'conducive', when we end up into a 'heart condition'! (It is so inspiring, to see that we humans still look at heart as a potential to remain 'unconditional' under 'ideal-conditions'!)

Where as when we say it is 'in condition'(about most other things), it indicates a 'health'!

I talked to the spouse of a person whom I knew very closely, to learn about the 'present-condition' of that person, 'as she saw him'... She happened to 'borrow' a very common expression that she had heard of... in order to some how convey... an observation of hers, a perception of hers, which remained elusive to her own judgement... this 'expression' made a reference to 'praana finding its way to sustain life in the body, amidst all the 'logically-negative clinical conditions prevailing in an aggravated manner' ... Most of these aggravated conditions came under the scanner when a medical examination was sought, and the obvious monitoring too happened at the ICU...!

This 'observation' of hers... amazed me! 'Oh!' I felt... 'if only she would take notice of this phenomenon of a 'non-judgemental-perception'... but, she is not available even to have such a wish, the way she (her mind) is positioned right now! Spiritual tools and techniques strive to enhance this style-of-perception. A good teacher would also strive to incorporate a safety-valve, where such perception does not itself become a 'commercialised-tool' (One of the teachings of 'the form' of Krishna during the Mahabharata, during the 'freeze' scenes where he has the exclusivity of a subtle 'unfrozen-motion' of articulation to Karna during the last few moments of Karna's life... Krishna explains, cites the improper application of 'knowledge', its sanctity.. and the result thereof... where knowledge fails to 'befriend' the person who possesses it, in times of crisis! The reference is towards degradation of that 'knowledge' into looking at it as 'yet another materialistic tool'... If one can capture this symbolism in its 'intended-sense' , not getting trapped into the veracity of the epic-story itself,... it does provide a key to several lock-blocks within, 'opening the bridge'.. not just 'opening the doors'... happens! The dramatisation of the story provides ample clue here to explain, why the 'hither-to' inimical-outlook towards the assailant-to-be transforms into a 'love-for-the-being-now'---what we get to see is, there is a warmth in the 'approach' when Karna later says, 'please behead me' to Arjuna, and yet proceeds to intensely strive at that 'mission-impossible' of removing the stuck wheel of the chariot... A logic-defying scenario indeed!)

When I was keeping 'track' of the clinical 'procedures' for the heart condition of that person, I was suddenly reminded of how the 'ancient pharmacologist' would have performed, at the behest of the physician! Somehow, the personal experience with spiritual practices thus-far, nudges me to 'believe' that it was not a coincidence that the ancient pharmacologists were 'preferably' females! There is a vaidya, who would prescribe to that 'femininity' inherent in that female, the 'methodology' of the approach(customised to suit the patient), towards the 'life-content' in the individual raw ingredients(usually herbs), which were in-itself, an amazing composition even individually, yet-individual, and holding a potential to release the nascent life energy latent in it, as a closely guarded potential, waiting to be released in its 'nascent' form, when carefully guided into a 'compatible' receptacle, under stringent lab-conditions and then, proceeding to invigorate the feeble, fatigued and weak 'prana' in that human being, to then-on proceed to re-vitalise the vital organs, etc! Where, there is not a female in the proximity, the vaidya himself does the invocation of feminine aspect within (and vice-versa, in those rare-cases of a female-vaidya, who does the analysis, while invoking the logical aspect of 'reasoning' to arrive at a fair-diagnosis, and then she already has that ingredient for a feminine-pharmacologist!)... Obviously, the beneficiaries are going to be a little ignorant about such intricate details, and the common word to refer the phenomenon in an aggregate fashion is.... to call it a 'miracle', and the performer's hands as 'kara-punya' ('Kara' symbolises the hands too... with which karma-kriya/performance... is usually 'hand-led/handled'!

Quite a long narrative already! I have to hold back a few more observations of mine for a spacious arena which might be available some time later (while 'we know'.... already... that the mind is going to 'only look at' a word at a time... the attention span, its miserly size, tends to blame it on the 'length'... all the time!. And as goes the saying, 'beggars cannot be choosers'... I have to outsource the 'choice' to the charity-giver here, while I beg for that 'attention-span'.. But someday, hopefully, when somebody decides to become 'choicelessness' as their very-way-of-being.... the 'well-being' of the being is ......not going to now-depend-on ... the 'being-well' of .....everything else.... about that being, which only belongs to that being, but never was a part of that 'being'!

Heartily conditioned, yours,

psn(26th September, 2014)

The 'Making' of a disciplined!

“Discipline, obedience.. (uske baad.. “something, and something” ... else.. I forget... while in NCC the ustaad tried to make us remember... Dilip Kumar jee gave that idea of 'beech mei 'something-something'.. in a dialogue... “Rangee ko Naa-rangee kahe... Doodh mei bana 'Khoya'.. {the ironical contradiction... Na-rangee is a citrus fruit, and it has 'a' color.. why call it na-rangee/non-colored?... something made out of milk is very much tangible, though a little compressed/concentrated, but why call it 'khoya'/lost?... beech mei 'something-something'... dekh kabira roya')....

Why do we need a 'discipline'? I used to wonder, when elders 'mention' it, ... while the teacher tries to 'enforce' it... (but, the teacher is not 'so-insistent' after her-working-hours... that is our school-hours!... The 'freedom-culture' of the west... 'in-its-making'.... ! Wah! Apna wala/our-own... reverence-culture... drained down the stream, in our shishtim/system of 'education'! All they do is just to make us literate... seldom to do anything with education!)...

Little do we realise... that disciple is the one who ever needs some discipline.. ... Others have to only 'adhere' to the nature's rhythm, and enjoy 'life' like a beautiful song, with karoke-sing-along style! If we are 'equipped' with a drum, do not try to look for strings of a violin inside it... just beat the drum, but cohesively with the 'violinist' next to us... Match making was not about making the same noise together, 'a-little-louder'! It was about harmony between two dissimilar instruments, to make the song.. the music ... a little more brighter, smoother, and a little more less-fatiguing!

Anyway, when the question came up... “What makes a person disciplined?( What is the secret behind being disciplined?)

at the forum: https://in.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20130810045304AAfQsbh

I came up with a diluted version of...

what occurred in my mind thus: “ Any refinement of any kind, involves.... some kind of self-imposed restriction...”

but the diluted version was : (what I gave out on the 'answers' forum of Yahoo bosses)...

“When the defects/disadvantages of an in-disciplined life-style comes too much in the way !
Other wise, mere sermons-listening is a good pastime.. why bother with 'needless-restrictions' when life happens the way we like!
Now, somebody suddenly takes a liking to 'feel' how it would be on Moon! The discipline starts... health fitness to withstand a space travel, the ability to walk carefully at 1/6th of gravity, ability to conserve even breathing air (tension increases breathing, and depletes oxygen!!!)...
...
A surgeon who is going to sew up a nerve of brain which is thinner than a hair (seen only thro' microscope), without blocking the passage of blood through that nerve, has to ...
has to... 'discipline' by abstaining even a cup of 'coffee' , one week ahead of the operation... the tiny hand shake due to 'caffine' needs such a discipline!
...
Suppose my doctor says, you will live only one more day... why waste time trying to have discipline! Enjoy!”

Discriminately disciplined, Yours,

psn(22 September, 2014)

Life is happening here and now!

There is a certain kind of 'vulnerability' that comes with certain stages of life... People usually call it as 'that-age' of a person, instead of looking at it as a 'stage of that person, where the age could fluctuate, waiting for that stage! Where the 'stage' is badly overlooked, the possibility of that person 'surprising' the onlookers with an expression “At this age(even)???...!!!!” ... such possibility is more!

In some rare cases, this 'stage' is all mixed up (there are even 'mystic-like' reasons, where we find that 'old head on young shoulders), etc...

When I found myself surrounded by those who were at a certain age, and also the 'stage-managed' freedom could not be curtailed, there was an offer : “Hey, are you interested to see the 'other-type' of films... those 'prohibited' ones?”.. and I said, “No thank you! I finished that long ago and have seen it 'live'!” And they asked me, “Arey baap re! So 'forward'?”... Now, they are asking for that...'trouble' ! (Left alone, I usually don't try to induce others into my-kind-of-thought-process!)..

I explained, “ I got to hear this phrase... 'Even dogs have a season!'.... That set me thinking.. I started with 'what are they talking about?... season for dogs?' Now I made up my mind, (at that kid-age!), to start observing dogs... Fortunately for me (rather, my experimentation-now-undertaken)... stray dogs were in plenty... and right on the roads... All that was needed was my own focus on them! They try to smell, before they try to mate! The curiosity about using this data-input-device... the sensory organ... persuaded me to focus a little deeper! They are usually driven by basic-instincts, unlike us, who are 'usually driven by a quixotic mind'.. So, the faults or the plus-points... if any, accrues to the 'natural way they are'... So, with that open mind, I can see their limitations (decided/designed by nature ofcourse), and their capabilities... I extended this 'observation' to other animals (and the field of survey.. was obviously constrained to remain confined to observing only domesticated animals, like cows, bulls, he and she buffaloes.. The pattern was with striking-similarities, and a few subtle distinctions! What baffled me was the 'absence of any gynecologist !' And nature .. also, their own nature.. actually 'befriended' them, guided them... even prior to conceivement! The right time to carry out that conception was decided prior to the act... Their antenna was 'deployed' towards fulfilling the nature's wishes! (I had to wait for my right-age, not even the 'stage' to ... later on observe, how we humans end up abusing/misusing this 'technique'! Why and where did we go wrong? Was the immediate-next question... That entailed that... the next observation needs to be towards, how we handle this 'self-awareness', from which evolves that 'conscious-choice-making' faculty! The rest of it becomes quite clear, when we find out where we took a 'wrong road' at the very first cross-roads!). It is not that 'none of the humans' ever did anything ... about right time to effect conception.. In fact they went way beyond the animals even when planning a healthy conception.. The ritual of deciding about a Muhurat for that too, is indicative enough when they tried to take help of astronomy, and deploy it via astrology, to tame the influences of gravity, etc... Science has explored enough to guess, that gravity is not just about earth... through subtle magnetism, far off celestial bodies too have their subtle-but-strong influences... (now we find such observations only while 'launching a space-rocket! The season, weather and climate has to be optimum!. The ancients look at 'launching a baby' ... It is a matter of choice, whether to sophisticate the raw materials, or the best product available out of same-raw-materials!!!.. If we 'unanimously' decide to award a same-side-goal.. we simply rewrite the rules of the game, not just shift the goal-posts.. that is perhaps, our-true-meaning of democracy and freedom.. we simply make it 'now-legal' about same gender relationships! A way of 're-defining' that emotional satisfaction!... Anyway emotions are unavailable to logic! )

Responding in an erroneous manner to some biological phenomenon, did not really seem to matter too much, for a spiritual evolvement (when there was an epic story to symbolise this, where a lady tells the husband “If only you had turned towards the 'supreme' with even half-the-intensity with which you came chasing me,..... misconstruing a corpse to be a wooden log, to cross that swollen hazarduous river, ..... misconstruing huge long snake to be a rope to climb down the tall overhanging branch of the tree, when the gates were not going to be opened at the dead of this night... if only half that intensity which caused so much 'blindness of vision towards sensory perceptions', perhaps, your other vision would have opened, to 'see' the supreme!”)....!!!

Then, what else to do?.. All I could do is to be 'available' where life was happening so intensely! Well, that simplified the matters... life , for me... has to happen only where I am situated now! It is my mind that often renders me oblivious to life happening so intensely with me.. The clue is now perhaps, into making myself more and more receptive to life's happening to me, with me! The needless insulations ought to be removed (when we buy gadgets, sensitive parts, like data ports, etc are well packed, to ensure its full functionalities, when unpacked, assembled, and made operational).. Sleep insulates me from 'experience of life' (at that age, that was the observation!).. So do everything to keep that sleep-duration to optimum needed levels! Food pattern decides the body's rest and recuperation dependence on sleep (when food fails to provided the needed energy, the body turns to seek it 'through sleep', to whatever possible extent... That feast, heavy lunch, loaded with junk-items... makes us drowsy too soon! That food, for which nature designed this body for, makes the body more alert after an intake of food! As an incidental benefit the sleep quota reduces, does not become zero or near zero!.... Much-much later, the same inquisitiveness and intensity of that 'search' led me to the techniques where the same 'sleep' quota can be reduced further, apart from the help received from food-pattern to reduce it... We may call that technique as 'meditative-process', though it is not a mandated thing that a 'process' is needed to become meditative... it can creep in naturally too (by itself), once the mind gets tamed (by whatever means, due to what ever reasons.. natural or otherwise too!).. the benefits, the easily tangible and noticeable ones are at .... even the physical level... the sleep quota gets reduced to such a level, that if an equanimous mind of a medical expert would observe, they would grasp the subtlety in the anatomy too! (The person himself, on the other hand is blessed with an experience itself, which he would struggle to express!)...

Oh! The length of the blog reminds me here that it is going to now test the patience of the reader!

Here and now yours,

psn(2nd September, 2014)

Treating a Treatment

“Mai aajkal, 'treatment' le raha hoon”... was the reply, which required a little time for me to get a 'grasp' of what they are actually implying...

'Kya haal-chaal-hai?' would have been a safer question.. because, it evokes a 'habit-driven' reply, not a conscious one.. and they say... 'chal-raha-hai' (when the going is not so good..), or that 'Changay haal hai/theek-thaak-hai' (when it is 'normal'..! Very few find life to be so-exciting, to say.. 'Jeevan ek vi-chitra-anubhav hai' (life is a deep experience beyond 'picturisation' etc..)...

That 'treatment' was some kind of an 'outsourcing' , when the 'treatment' meted out to them by nature was intolerably-uncomfortable; they look at it as 'nature is ill-treating-me'.. (not withstanding what I do.. to the gift of this amazing machine, the human body, that nature has gifted to me!)... and they are unable to handle this 'ill-treatment' all by themselves... Now, the vaidya/daaktar... is allowed to do his 'treatment' with this-body-of-mine... My job is to 'present' myself before him, and say, 'I am unwell'... (The doctor knows.. he has to 'ask' a variety of questions, to get to the 'real-feel' within... when singular queries would yield only 'mind-feel' from his patient, who has turned impatient by now, with a chronic-ailment... !)...

...

So, it was not a complete surprise, when I saw a question which dealt about 'treatment' by others, and it felt to the mind to be 'unjust'.. (a typical case of 'justice handed over into inept hands?'... dunno!)

Usually, if we look at the 'west' ... the statistics seem to suggest ( I heard that every 4th doctor-consultant is a psychiatrist, and charges by hours.. in dallars!), seem to suggest that... people are more concerned about 'ill-treatment' to their mind, than to their physical body itself! Maybe, the 'freedom-culture' doesn't give too many details about how to 'ensure a mind's freedom' while, our reverential kind of culture , never even looks at that mind's freedom, when it decides to surrender it too often! (But yes, the present day problems are usually , when we surrender to our politicians, who, due to their acts of 'omission & commission' steer the whole nation, whole society, towards a restlessness-of-mind.. we are still fairly unmoved by 'living conditions' while we react to 'disturbed mind'... people who manage to put their mind into wakeful-sleep, manage to remain stoic to 'all kinds of living conditions'.. .. and hence remain 'indifferent' to whole-sale-corruption of such great magnitude.. Waking them up requires a unique skill!)...

...

So, the question was ... how to deal with the 'residue' of an 'unjust-treatment'!

I liked it!

(Like in that English movie, 'Independence Day'... a virus uploaded, gives a few moments of time, for our hero to penetrate that defenseless-computer-driven-shield, and make a dent into the alien spacecraft... Somebody becomes a little-more-receptive, when an unjust-treatment or rather the residual effect of it... renders them 'defenseless' for a while!)...

quote:

Question:

How can I get over being treated unjustly?

( the details of the question... for those interested, at this link: https://in.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20140820002533AAA3VAz

My answer:

Nice question.. ("How can I get rid of this anger and hurt, and get on with my life???")
Is it possible to compel people (others), to be very fair to everybody around?
We only try to be fair, when we see that we need the 'respect of others' and popularity of being 'normally a fair person towards others'... Very few are equanimous, even if there is nobody to judge them, in turn!
When we are already under some sort of social compulsion, we find it also-fair to impose an expectation out of others to be also-fair-towards us!
Others, a few of them, might be taking that risk, and it turns unfavorable to us...
If we can reconcile to this limitation of ours, regarding the power to compel others (whether due to lack of rules, or due to other reasons)... we 'accept' that situation outside of us, was and never will be, in our control... It releases us from such 'unreasonable-expectations'.. the anger would dissolve! (We are not exactly 'angry' when a mosquito/snake/dog bites us... we get annoyed at the most... if we are a bit sensible, we try to be more alert about it, or take good-precautions! Here also, we take precautions, and if possible help future students from being treated in an unfair manner!).

Unquote:

(Having answered thus... I was amused to look at the 'treatment' meted out by a spiritual guide, to a disciple... when, the luxury of 'having the trust into that teacher' gets an 'ill-treatment' too often! When there is nothing left to hang on to.... the disciple feels a 'let-go' to be the only available option... and then, the surrender happens 'all-by-itself'... and ... no further 'treatment' is 'ever-required'!!! Bass... 'treat-hi-treat' hai...! Like, we demand a 'treat' from a friend who achieves some distinction in life... here the experience of 'distinctness' is itself a big 'treat'... obviating any 'treatment of any kind' whatsoever!)...

A treat (perhaps, or hopefully), yours

psn(25th August, 2015

Durvaasa on a long leave, any takers for that post?

“Just one request, dear friend... when ever you 'plan' to go on a long leave, please tell me a little ahead of time”... that was what a very close friend and a good colleague asked of me, as an 'obligation'! It does not cost me anything at all, to pass this information, on to him, even 'ahead' of that formal written request-application... But it did not take me too long, to grasp 'his-purpose' of such request... He was classified as a 'leave-reserve' for that 6-month-period. Every six months, the duties are 'rotated' at the place where I worked for 30+ years, within the workplace itself... It was a win-win situation, but for a few, who liked to grow roots, and remain rooted cozily, it was an irritation. When a 'replacement-clerk' has to 'take-care' of a work-desk only for a short period, like a day or two, the task is at-once simple... The dependents of that work-table would listen to a chant 'the permanent fellow is on leave today... come after he comes..'... and this chant constitutes the 'bulk of the work'... But at some tables, work has to be done/performed! No time to even chant! That makes the job a little difficult!

Strangely enough, even long before I had the need to apply my mind to such 'replacement-of-job-doers' concepts... I found myself asking a few close friends of my kid-age thus, one day: “Arey yaar! Suppose, that Sage Durvaasa is going to request for a long-leave... to his boss (whoever it is, Brahma-the-writer of destiny/Vishnu-the incharge of company's routine-daily-affairs/ or even that Maha-Eeesh, Maheshwara/etc), ... who would volunteer to take that 'role'?... He (Durvasa),is said to be a 'permanent-staff' with a permanent set-of-duties... stretching into eternity!”.. ... My friends became wide-eyed, at such a proposal, though they knew as well as me... that such people as Durvasa were on 24-hours-duty, without any leave of any kind!... At work place the rules too, reminded us.. 'rules of any kind is not a matter of right, to an employee, and therefore the discretion rests with the sanctioning authority, who has to take into account the 'exigencies' instead of turning down any request indiscriminately.

Durvasa, the name itself reminds us of that 'curse' he distributes so liberally, when the anger is his main-fuel, which gets a spark at the 'drop-of-a-hat'! Not that people did not take 'ample precaution'.. We have the example of a 'Kunti' who ... 'in-order-to-prevent' Durvasa's fuel getting ignited, served him 'self-less-ly' (which sense of that 'self' was what I became curious about, when I saw that the 'boon' she received instead of a curse, did not really-benefit-her! It benefited the 'happening of a great epic'.. but she did get the role, of regretting that boon being used so prematurely, primitively... when, Karna stipulated much later ... when it was already-too-late, that 'she would still have 5 of her sons left...' when it was about a 'either-or-survivor' basis, between Karna and Arjuna!....

Durvasa, unlike other sages, did not need a replenishment of 'power' when he curses (it is said that the power of austerity diminishes, when used-up to pronounce a curse!)...

I tried to draw the attention of my friends to the possibility that Durvasa is unlikely to have too many friends and well-wishers around him! Even the admirers would keep a 'safe-distance'.. There are side stories too, where Durvasa himself failed to curb his 'tendency to become angry' ... The kind of anger he invoked within, seemed to be 'intune' (not asur, 'bay-sura'... ) with the embedded-designs of Maya-Madam! I was not interested at that point of time, into other details, like 'how and why, Durvasa happened to take up such a role?'.... Obviously, he fitted into that role too well! My friends, for the next few days started looking at characters around them, who took-up such not-so-attractive roles in our daily lives!... We discussed the 'blessings-in-disguise' aspect of such un-sung heroes, who scripted our own mind's growth into a life-positive direction, when they did not bother about any acknowledgement/recognition, and more importantly, when they did not mind the reciprocal 'feel-good-gestures' of warm affection of people around ( it is so difficult to visualise ourselves giving a 'warm-hug' to a porcupine when it 'blushes' with its quills!

History tells us, that 'Kings of ancient India' did take care to institute a one-man-organisation at least, when they realised that people around would not dare to find-fault with the king... and they were called court-jesters, who were insulated by a heavy insurance policy which indemnified them from a punishment-curse, by the king... Today, criticism itself is so-commercialised... the curse is also a commercial-one(as we 'feel it' .. not 'the way it is'... But, nature catches up too soon with commercial-considerations, and we call it a calamity/disaster/etc! ).

I even tried that role of 'criticism' with all the care it needs, but, the care, at a very basic level only, since the commercial-needs for a survival was already kept at a very low profile within me.. and the 'experience' helped me to learn and gain a deep insight into a spectrum of varieties, of things that affect a mind, labelled as 'criticism'! What goes into making it into a 'curse' was a deeper aspect, and required a 'mystic's mind' to explore into it! Astrology could only 'indicate' the possibility or scope, looking into the birth-chart of a person, whose 'pronouncements' often 'take-shape'...! Such people are 'mini-Durvasa's' , if we may like to 'classify' them into a homogeneous group/cluster!

And to think of our ancients who even managed to find a way to 'have reverence' to a role like that of Sage Durvasa!!! His curses seldom attracted any adverse comments from auditors! And he did not spare the 'auditors' even!

Unsparingly yours,

psn(21st August, 2014)

Deserving and Eligible

“Please ask the Government to firstly change the criteria, and then try to pressurize me.... You wouldn't even need to pressurise me... I just follow the criteria prescribed, whether I personally subscribe to it or not... I am doing what I am paid to do, nothing less,... and yet something more, only when it does not contravene the 'theme' of rules/criteria, and any adverse consequence, if at all is going to accrue, should belong only-to-me!”

I was a witness to this emphatic statement conveyed over a phone, with a quite assertive manner by a person holding powers of sanctioning an educational loan, but was avoiding 'yielding to political pressure, applied through higher officials in the hierarchy...!

It was my turn to examine, within myself, whether my admiration for such bold statement (the consequences are quite imaginable!), whether my admiration was due to my 'affinity for the person?' (he is a very good friend of mine!.. when it is a 'friend' doing anything, we are inclined to say 'okay' to it!)... whether it was due to his uprighteousness? (Oh! It is too comprehensive a term to verify the application-part and cross-check!... whether it was his clarity about what was expected of him? The clarity envisages a thorough knowledge about the actions needed to be done in a situation, while maintaining coherence with the 'preamble' (purpose), of what is expected out of such prescribed routine! Yes... this seems easier to follow... and that is where I found a little-more-clarity about the two terms, 'deserving and eligible'!!! When decision-making is already based on fuzzy-logic, the existing clarity-even, between such-two-similar-looking-terms would evaporate, for a while! Emotions are unavailable to logic... If we try to help an emotion, through our emotion potential, (typically that 'counselling'), are we able to decide the 'criteria' of 'eligibility and deserving' distinctly-enough to be able to apply 'our-selves' (that is what emotional help means, the whole of our being, applied, unreservedly!), apply ourselves a bit sensibly, reasonably, etc?... Often a woman would say to a male 'Please leave me alone for a while...' (Mujhe kuch daer ke liye akela chor deejiye Kripaya), implying... 'you fool, you are neither capable of knowing the parameters of 'eligibility and deserving', nor are you able to assess your own levels of the potential to extend that emotional-support!

At times, the criteria of 'eligibility' steps over the deserving-parameters ... A Red Cross volunteer chooses to save the life of an enemy soldier who is fatally/vitally hit/injured, even if the volunteer belongs to the other side of the border... If healthy, that soldier deserves to be shot down (parameters are exclusive here!)... If that person is a non-combat-civilian of other side of the border (say a woman, child, or an aged person), the deserving parameter insulates them from the injury-sought-to-be inflicted by a 'deserves to be shot-down' parameter, where as, the same non-combatant has to be restrained from playing a spy-role, etc...

When I was a kid, I was amused to find this 'clarity' in the elders, but only while they deal with kids... They would say 'This adult is wrong, and deserves to be admonished... but you are not 'eligible' to speak against him/her!!!' (it leaves the kid 'wondering' about these strange rules of 'elders'!!!)... On the other hand, if we are inclined to look at it on a 'no-risk' basis, the epic stories provide the scope... In the great epic war of Mahabharat... Drona Versus 5 Pandavas, ... a few scenes of provoking each other, provides ample scope to debate when both the sides mix-up the eligibility+deserving criteria... Drona hopes to prevent the Pandavas from chasing Jayadrata or so, to slay him before 'sunset' ... using 'verbal gimmicks' and teases the Pandavas, saying 'I am your enemy here, fight me first'... While the 4 out of 5 Pandavas quote a different criteria 'You are our Guru first'... and evade him, Bhima merely says, “So-be-it” and attacks Drona... (who is/are.... right/and/or/wrong/etc... and why are they so.. is a matter of choice for those who are indulging in only a 'reading-for-pastime' criteria.. where as ... it is a matter of deeper perception for those interested in imbibing spiritual-concepts!

What do we do with ourselves, when we try to use up the resources? Do we deserve?... Are we eligible?... Does the inheritance-parameters, or 'the'... earned-parameters.. by social standards, at once going to 'scale-up' our eligibility and deserving parameters way beyond the 'nature's rules?'... We seldom attempt to probe into these aspects, and then... over a period of time, the decision-making-process preempts even the introspection, and the resultant response-process 'seems' natural and intuitive even! What seems 'natural' obviates the need for any re-look... But when somebody attempts a walk on that pathless path, the spiritual one, ... all these 'hitherto-neglected-parameters' become heavily operational, and all-at-once... and then there is a hectic confusion about many crucial aspects ... like ... 'how to choose a Guru?'... why does that Guru not choose me?.... why am I not able to 'experience' so-and-so thing despite years of intense practices?... etc...

At 'normal-life-levels'... we pamper the body undeservedly ending up as couch-potatoes, while the alertness and attentiveness of the mind pays the price, in terms of 'eligibility' for deeper perception and passes on the costs to the body itself, over a period of time, rending it 'eligible' for a medical care on a 'routine-basis'!!! Hey! Now, even I am confused here... mixing commercial aspects into non-commercial self-items!

Fortunate are those, I would say.... who are able to check the parameters itself, of every attempt-even, to define-afresh, the need itself, to apply the concepts of 'deserving and eligible' with a spiritual sense too, while dealing with worldly matters also... The side benefit perhaps might be that humility, or a sense-of-humility, creeps in through back door, and gets stuck on to their forehead, visible only to others, and therefore the 'subtle eligibility criteria' transcends the 'not-yet-deserving' proviso under the karmic baggage selected out of 'sanchita' godown... etc... (this 'karmic' and 'sanchita' are fuzzy terms, used indicatively ... for mere reference purposes, to pave a way, towards understanding the rules of absolute-world, via empirical experiences, till this bridge/ladder becomes redundant!)

Undeservedly yours,

psn (18th August, 2014)

Skepticism

“That is what you think!”

We as school kids decided to play this game for a while...

The rule was, when one of us in the group, says some 'statement of fact' (what ever it be... almost all grammatically correct sentences end us as statements of fact, when it is about something routine, and needs no arguments to examine and agree with, like the date and time of the day/night, the names assigned to us for personal identity purpose etc), whenever somebody says 'Today is a Monday' the other person plays the game of saying 'That is what you think'! (By mutual consent, we agreed not to get annoyed! Little did we realise the implication of what this kind-of-consent is going to do to our 'mind' in terms of evolving into a 'scientific temper' in the later part of our lives! At least I did realise the 'transformation' that happened towards a 'scientific-receptivity' towards skeptical people, way beyond the personal individualistic-concerns.. and the benefits were awarded/paid, in 'spiritual-currency' if I may borrow or coin such a phrase for the sake of humor)!

But anyway, we had great fun... There was a condition too.. a self-imposed one... that the receiver of 'that's what you think' should sincerely try and convince the other, while the other fellow keeps chanting the same mantra (that's what you think...), to every subsequent effort to clarify that “No.. it is not just-what-I-think, but it is true/a-fact/verifiable/etc too....”... We did not make any conscious decision to 'end/stop' this game... The kid-mind it was, some 7th standard at school, and like many good and bad habits, this dropped off soon, only to be replaced by some other mind-game!

....

As an adult, when required to deal with real-life-situations, I seemed to counter people playing this very game quite unawares, when their own pre-judices stiffened into a resistance, being basically provoked by that instinctive safety belt called 'fear' (presented/manifested, through sophisticated attributes, socially acceptable ones!)... At work-places, the rules-in-force, came handy to deal with certain situations... A few other situations could be handled when I make it explicit that the risk is all-mine, while the benefits are 'all-yours'... this part, did produce a few occasional side-benefits, like , the inquisitive ones set-about-to-also-think , something like this 'what is it that makes this fool to render himself so vulnerable?'... If the thinking deepens without a hurried 'prejudice' the next side-benefit is a little bit of trust ! That is something quite 'handy-a-tool' to work with that mind, towards a spiritual-possibility!.. Typically, at homes, where the basic nature of relationship is 'demanded-of' to be emotional in nature (while it gets wound up into commercial considerations too often), this 'second-level-side-benefit'.... of trust..... wriggles a lot like a baby trying to come out of a stubborn womb, and the constrictions of the passage route, complicated by restraints of inability of even a cesarean method) and the people 'concerned'... figuratively/literally, grope within and without, to find out 'what went wrong'....!

This skepticism, when it gets an insulation of 'socially established standards of life-style', deprives us of the bulk of the benefits of a spiritually evolved society (of say, ancient times), and even the very flaws and faults get heavily obscured to the 'sensory-level-eye' and its own forms of 'vision' formed thereby! There was a movie .... The title was 'Guru'... The story is about a 'society' that got isolated somehow, within a valley or so, impregnable for other societies to reach so-easily.. The people there were visually-blind, without any exception!... A fiction of course, to convey the theme of mind's 'ignorant-blindness'... The hero, from our world lands there... He could 'see' that every body was blind! But even among them there was a class-difference, similar to our 'casteism' problems.. The two castes clashed often, and maintained a 'distance'.. the obvious rivalries led to innovation into defense-systems, typically unique to blind-societies.. The main dependence was on 'sound-hearing'... They were so-proud of their 'achievements at hearing-sharp' (a subtle reference to our scientific achievements!)... The hero was 'caught', since he was not used to 'not-making' noises, the way the people of those two-groups got trained into! Now his problems with his captors were 'unique'! Somewhere he discovers that these people eat a particular fruit, which caused this 'blindness' but over generations, there was no 'remedy' since babies were also fed this fruit, at the very infancy, and these babies(the next generation), grew 'with blindness, by default'!!!... He managed to avoid eating this fruit for a while... But later he too ate it, and became blind... His 'crimes' (basically, as an unwelcome intruder into their society---- VISA-problems!) invited punishment.. He was 'sentenced' to a punishment, which involved eating another poisonous fruit... 'supposed/believed, to cause instant death' It so turned out that, this punishment-fruit was the 'remedy for blindness'!!!! It restored vision, instead of 'causing death'... This fiction part is 'used' by the story teller to 'educate' the hero of the movie about roots-of-terrorism, the blind beliefs held by fanatic-groups etc... (the movie is too slow moving.. and hence not so popular... it takes a lot of patience to keep watching 'blind-people'!!!_).

I tried to take a look at what dictionary says about skepticism... (but I guess, it was too late, since the blog-blurted out, (got vomited out, along with the last medicine-tablet), before the meaning took effect in me...!!!

http://www.thefreedictionary.com/skepticism

quote:

“a personal disposition toward doubt or incredulity of facts, persons, or institutions.”

“the doctrines or opinions of philosophical Skeptics, especially the doctrine that a true knowledge of things is impossible or that all knowledge is uncertain. Cf. Pyrrhonism.”

Evolved masters use a unique kind of 'general anesthesia' when it becomes too difficult to find a tool to deal with the skeptical-mind of a student, who is 'otherwise' willing for a tutelage, while those masters who are 'otherwise-disposed' do it clandestinely, unassumingly(they do not even assume a human-form... so , we can say, in the both the senses of 'unassumingly', figuratively, and empirically!)...

Positively-skeptical, yours,

psn(16th August, 2014)

Insensitively immune

Insensitively immune

What if our 'immunity' is merely the functionality of an incidental by product (what ever it is), of our insensitivity?

It is a highly 'sensitive' issue (of course, here again it is 'subject to availability of sensitivity too'), and therefore, the vulnerability is higher for the 'self' than the risk to the 'other' (in this case, 'the other' being ... the quixotic 'me'!... And a few closely known people, at times, try to solve a riddle about my-sensitivity-related-issues...!!!).

Now, if the mind becomes 'insensitive'...???? Is it , (the insensitivity) about our logic, the reasonableness of its approach... or is it confined to emotion itself? Or is it about certain queer situations where the response 'ought-to-be' a refined-mixture of both? Dunno!

....

I shall attempt to afford a 'relax' laxative, trying to recount an incident: A comedian of Tamil movies of yester-years, Mr.Thangavelu, was asked during a radio-interview, as to how he managed to 'drop' humor instances in movies so abruptly, and so effectively, when his physical stature did not allow him the gimmicks that other younger comedians of his period made use of, in a compensatory/supplementary manner for the lack of their own 'gift of gab'! And he came out with a practical 'clip' of one of his movies:

The Marriage broker: “Sir... if you can elaborate a bit, about 'what-kind-of-a-groom' you are looking for?......???”

The anxious father: “ Preferably ... 'a male' human being of course!”

Now, this example, ... is it not a bit 'obsolete' or outdated ... due to the 'way we decided to advance' (We are a 'well-advanced' society now... and hence perhaps, a bit immune to such jokes, be it due to insensitivity or whatever!)

When, our dear politicians are keen about sensitizing an aam-aadmi into a fervor of patriotism ('only-to-the-extent' of serving their own political ambitions!), how do we 'find' admiration for a spiritual teacher who strives/seeks to invoke the 'spiritual-sensitivity' in us, and undertakes to do 'whatever-it-takes'...!!!! Dunno!

Sensitive immunity of,

(of course) yours,

psn(13th August, 2014)

Cleanliness, Hygiene (and maybe 'purity' too!)

“Disrobe him... and that would be enough!”

That was the instruction which I received, when I was deputed to relocate a kid (a baby) closer to that kid's mom, and then to be breast-fed, when the mom was a 'declared' untouchable for 3 days...

I was barely 6+ years old then....

Even while I was carrying out the instructions, which demanded great attentiveness (not mere alertness, nor that 'awareness' in the least!), I felt flooded with several questions within me!

I am not yet an 'adult', and if I touch an 'untouchable', I am to go to have an head-bath instantly, before I end up as a 'pollutant', though I am just a nascent-untouchable, meaning, the pollutants of that untouchability was yet to permeate too deep into me (so I felt)... Bah! Too many abstract concepts to handle for a kid of my age, and the pain is not about 'not-understanding it' but about non-availability of people around to explain it 'instantly' (the very look on their faces, the long faces... did not warrant a re-look to 'know' if it was really safe to spell out such queries!)...

Growing up with such abstract-concepts-related questions was never without complexities (by now, 'any complexity seemed a problem'... during that growing-kid-age!).

Is 'Maya-moh' uncleanliness, while remaining within 'pure' maya was okay? Is it detachment without attachment of any-kind(a 'pure-detachment' .. while desire for detachment is also a kind of attachment! Hey, this cleanliness business is getting muddier!)... which 'way' is it?

When I looked at Kerala-versus-Rest of India... people take bath any number of times, so cheerfully! Even the believers of Holy-Quran are not left out of this 'tendency' (Hey! Try to appreciate, I am carefully trying to avoid being 'communal' in the present-day-political-sense, and so meticulously, but, as-best-as-possible!). And in-keeping with this 'tendency' the ritual seems to rhyme, when the austerities of that Holy-Hill-visit (sabarimala—18-holy-steps, + the deity which was said to be 'mere' wood hitherto, till it got burnt by the brunt of a mysterious-fire recently---something to do with 'cleanliness'?... that wood-deity, instead of a stone?... dunno!). The query that my quixotic mind churned out was, “Why start taking a bath twice-a-day, right from 41 days ahead, when the journey itself was far away, and the 'darshan' or viewing of the shrine was some 45+ days later? Other temples prescribe a bath only once, and that too, if the visit is during fore-noon, the afternoon visits need only a limb-wash, if that ritual of a bath has taken place during the morning. Very interestingly, once that 'garland/necklace' is ritualistically worn, (placed on the neck by the Guru-swami), that bath is not a 'must', and only a 'preferable' one, during journey-phase to Sabarimala-Hill!!

Certain dis-eases, ailments, or whatever... are signified as 'concluded' only after a bath, but the bath is to be after a stipulated length of days (not time, significantly... a person at arctic circle has only 'days' for half the year... so what if that innocent-fellow gets infected by this dis-ease? -- a side question, if allowed!

I was personally not too keen about either cleanliness or the hygiene even at physical level, and much to the annoyance of the 'religious' people around me, who thought that my birth itself was such that my Karmic garbage polarised more towards non-cleanliness, and un-hygienic locations... What even-I-missed ... to take note of was, the questions that erupted within me was mostly hovering around 'purity' of a being! Did I therefore, tend to by-pass the 'norms' that infested/polluted the mind, with over-emphasis on cleanliness and hygiene?... (Hey, am I turning into an atheist kind-of-mind?... was the side-question, within ... especially, when it 'seemed' too stupid to 'ask' for something, from that stone-idol, called a 'deity', said-to-represent an huge monster-sized God, who was said to pervade and permeate into everything around! Is He so dumb, to be 'told' about my needs?... that raises yet-another-set of questions! Is my 'need' going to match my 'wants'/desires/and-the-likes?... Hey, is my mind clean, hygienic, or... err... pure??!!!.. dunno!).

This cleanliness business is not going to leave me alone... Now 'science' says (what an impersonal expression!), that... Uranium rods meant for nuclear thermal power stations, are cleaned by the rings, of the very same material, passed over it several times, along its length, without the need of this cleaning 'material' ever touching the object-to-be-cleaned!!! Woh un-touchability ka kya hua? (what happened of that 'untouchability?... Is it a pointer towards the 'distinct' untouchability maintained by 'sanyasis' of ancient days? Aadi-Shankara's work, translated via German language, seemed to provide some 'clues' to the heavily encrypted original sanskrit text!!! The Germans, remain 'clean' in a unique way, when it is about 'scientific-mind'.. they do not run-after-fame/name!)... Flame of camphor, it seems, can be 'scooped' into palms, and 'poured' over one's head to clean the 'ushna' (a kind of heat), when the taapa (the temperature) of that camphor is within tolerance levels, and 'fire' (of the camphor's 'flame'... remains in the back-drop... visual-side of its subtle-effects.... and the 'agni-tatwa', the fire-ness... cleanses the 'life-being' within... the manifest form of life, the praana!... Quite a complex-concept.. when it gets compacted so subtle!... If this concept 'holds-good', it also perhaps explains, that too-frequent head-bath, prescribed during several of rituals (especially death-related ones), and during the tools-&-techniques of rigorous practices enroute a spiritual journey(one of the 'paths' of spiritual journey!)....

It is not for 'nothing' that we have thought of nappies, sanitary-wears,.... and now in 'adult-sizes' too... condoms included... when our mind decided to do away with 'cleanliness' in its subtle forms! But, hygiene is something that we cannot 'hope' to do without.. and so... 'use-and-throw'.. finds a place! (the 'junk' that we inadvertently litter around, belongs to next-generation, not us... for we too seek to 'get-thrown-away'... since the cosmic games are non-pollutable!....

(Is it not a bit 'strange-like' when a snake remains clean most of its 'life-times', and stranger when people opine, that... snake is the only creature that manages to tolerate a 'human-vibe' a little better than all other creatures?... Is that symbolism of Shiva adorning his neck with a snake, or that Vishnu posing like a couch-potato on a huge-snake, on that water-bed, anything to do with their-own-sense of symbolic-cleanliness?... dunno!)

Meanwhile, I was reminded of a question posed to the audience by a teacher, “What is a 'pure-being'...?” (while others were trying/groping-within... for a 'logical-answer', I was flooded with memories of 'experiences' that happened during the hitherto-rigorous practices, related to spiritual-evolvement... and so, the answer got dissolved into the search triggered by this question, and I looked 'dumb-founded' to others around!.. dunno, what it is gonna do here with us!)...

Unhygienically clean.. yours,

psn(10th August, 2014)

Blame Game!

It is an amazing defense mechanism when in the deft hands... (hands?.. err, don't blame the hands, when it is the tongue which does the manipulation of a steady stream of sounds emitted from lung-full of air... The back office function is outsourced to a fuzzy thing called mind, so brain is free-from-blame).

When I feel out of 'good-stuff', just say “I am not having good-leisure these days, and so, I may not churn out blogs/comments like I used to!” (impersonal blame, and yet an effective defense!)

The peak efficiency of this blame game gets noticed during a hectic session of performance like conducting a large marriage function with very few trust-worthy people to help! The mind, decides what to plan first for a successful-conduct of the function... And then, when success depends upon countering the guided missiles of a blame from the 'other-side' (much more than the grandeur of the conduct itself, of the function/event), the first plan of a 'sensible-mind' would be to create a list of 'possible, valid defenses, consisting of 'blame games'). Like... In case the power goes.... 'Oh! It never used to trip/go, and so I couldn't think of a back-up'... and then if the power arrives surprisingly, the reverse of blame-game would be 'blessings in disguise'!(but never the conscientious duty-conscious efforts of the power-supply-employee, though power is never known to have got restored 'by-itself', when it is got-lost due to a disconnect somewhere!)...

Does this blame-game mechanics, the nobility of survival-concept that it offers as a defense, etc... afford a spiritual growth? The journey can happen only from where we are right now, and nowhere else.... And, knowing 'where we are right now?' becomes indispensable to the 'initiation' of the journey's commencement... The teacher or a guide may be a better person to be able to 'view' where we are right now, while we are yet to drop the blame-blanket and view the real image on the polished mirror in front of us (or was it a blanket of blame?)...

'Who is wrong' versus 'what went wrong'... etc has become an tool/excuse to adorn a seminar on how to improve efficiency,.... or.... how to reduce attrition.... how to avoid a revolt... and such dysfunctional aspects, but very rarely to innovate(like, somebody who stood at the flooding river, and said 'I will build a dam'.... Maybe, somebody would think of a 'level of perception beyond sensory levels' too!)

Faultily Yours,

psn(4th August, 2014)

Stream Lining!

An amazing word! (I felt)...

'Now all we gonna do is to 'stream-line' things here'... announces a leader, when the 'set-up' is up-set at a place.

A (water)stream, runs the way it finds a slope... Armed with this 'knowledge', as a kid (school-days), I barely managed to decipher the togetherness-wala-meaning of stream, and lining it up! But the quest did not go a waste!... I had my play-partners, at the native village, where my cousins were 'destined' to end up as farmers, when the stock-in-trade of that family was cultivable lands at the very backyard. Then, it was a 'two-in-one' for them... Lining the stream was a game + help to elders... And for me, it was a 'strictly-prohibited' area of no entry... Summer months were the holidays there, and water was a little scarce... These cousin-play-mates used to take that mud-scraper (the desi-version of a spade), and 'line-the-stream' of water to reach the farthest of trees, plants and fields to quench the thirst of 'awaiting' live things, we call as 'greenery' ...

It was then... I noticed, the line of stream.. was deliberately made crooked! (Like in algebra, we manipulate equations, to easily 'solve' them later, with things like 'dividing throughout by 'x'', adding some-nonsense to 'both the sides' etc...).... The crookedness was to match the eccentricity of a small shrub, a tiny plant, (often of high medicinal value), which is adamant about 'surviving a transplantation'(very much like a few 'modern' bride who resists 'relocation', unlike old times, where a baalika-vadhu hardly would notice the difference)! The tiny shrub was 'pampered' with deviated 'stream-lining'! Something that a very dexterous Guru would do to 'oblige' a high-potential-filled disciple, when he scales down his own 'sense of discipline' which, otherwise seems a 'rigor' to that 'rouge-within-the-otherwise-innocent/ignorant-disciple'!!!

Armed with these 'quixotic-ideas' of mine-alone... ( I felt too embarrassed to 'share' it even, with other kids... they might 'find' yet another scope, to mock-at-me, for my 'out-of-this-world' and needless, stupid, philosophies!).. so, armed with these 'ideas', I felt... time to try out 'stream-lining' my own routine, as an experiment...

Very soon, I discovered... the 'mind' is what needed to be stream-lined.... cohesively, so as to stay riveted into/onto ... a task, that is sought to be stream-lined. The best of advantages came out in the form of an 'inspiration' when I saw that any stream-lined repetitive task became effort+time-efficient! (It is only later that Ifelt, this word 'inspiration' was a thorough over valuation of such benefits... the word 'inspiration' deserves a better candidate to confer itself as an attribute, instead of these worldly-side-benefits!).

Stream-lining the spiritual concepts, when it is sought to be reached, through arduous looking tools and techniques, became a real task, a real challenge! In essence, it was initially about 'stream-lining' the very 'thought-stream' (vichaar pravaah), into a manageable thought-trickle (vichaar-dhaara)... the way the medicinal oil is to trickle at the top of the head of the patient, when he is subjected to the conceptual-essence of 'life-sciences' that we know as 'Ayur-veda'!

Streamed, but not-yet lined-up, yours,

psn(8th July, 2014)

Scars!

“क्षतचिह्न"

The attempt to translate it had to be from the 'meaning' rather than the word itself...!

Hindi speaking people from Hind-us-thaan (or India that is Bhaarat), may not have bothered too much about 'scars' in the ancient days! Dunno! But... again, interestingly, the ancients were not 'entirely' unconcerned about 'scars'... I did feel 'intrigued' when they called that 'turmeric-stained rice grains' used for blessing, with a symbolic gesture ... as 'A-kshatah' ... a 'non-scarred one'...!!! It 'seems', the husk was carefully peeled without letting the grain to 'even-know' that it was being stripped of its clothing! Perhaps, they 'knew' the worth of 'seeding', while we have mutilated-in-practice/application-part, the significance of what we call a few gathering/s as 'seminars', instead of 'conference'/meeting/etc. Today, the 'disposable' kind of rice (usually, rationed-rice at fair-price-shop, is the 'chosen' one to be turmeric stained, and thrown on the 'well-dyed' heads of 'beneficiaries'! Anyway, it is not 'that-fit' for consumption... throw it, litter it, spill it... in a 'religious-way'!).

'Daag' has a different connotation. While on clothes, it is not without a solution (though the stain might be insoluble in cleansing chemicals), but at subtle levels, this 'stain' connotes what our 'status' holds for others... scar is slightly different... we carry it upon-ourselves!

Women(at least some of them), are 'more worried' about a scar, than the injury itself, that had caused it!... (A lady colleague of mine, once suffered skin abrasions, when the pressure cooker chose to intimate a bit loudly that she, the working-cooker, had forgotten to 'water the plant' ... the cooker's inside-base with those two crucial cups of water, before placing the 'priority-dish' with its own cooking-water!... Out of the 'stream' of visitors to the hospital ward, the voiced-concern of her close lady-colleagues was.... 'is the scar going to be permanent?'... and I was all attention to 'see' what the face-expression is going to say, while the words would lean towards 'only an appropriate' reply ... 'our courtesy' levels demand that such 'ex-gratia' acts are received with 'strict-adherance' to 'appropriate-replies' rather than factual-based experiences. This lady chose to be uninsured, and said 'I really don't know'.. She was good-looking despite that scar already, and this, might have irritated a few others around! ).

Only after I 'grew' up beyond the physical growth even, did I notice that scars came to be 'sought-after-thing' for some youngsters... But they liked it only on their clothes... the Jeans-pant! The cow-boy-movie-heroes with torn-and-stitched pants with those patches became a 'rage'... I tried to look-out for something similar in girls, but only 'rare-ones' (In all probability, they might be 'trial' sessions, out of 'borrowed-garments-never-fit-well' wala scheme!).

Villains have a scar as a 'make-up' in movies... it is a show-of-sustenance levels (not exactly a 'tolerance' level)!

I was in for a surprise, when that spiritual pursuit tried to reveal the mind-related problems presenting a hurdle into deepening of perception beyond sensory levels! That is when this scar's scary business got itself into a 'limelight' in my view/vision! The solace, initially, ..... and the solution, later on... dawned with the 'reassurance' in the words 'Api chaydasi paapebhyaha... vrijinam sam-tarishyasee' (Gita, the song-divine)... And what better place to place it than a war-field where scar-wounds abound!

As a society, or as a nation... tainted-politicians respond to 'public-exposure' a lot-differently today. (And we take after them, often. Maybe it is thus... that... the phrase 'innocent-divorcee' got coined to signify, that the 'so-called-scar' is not really 'that-deep', while the surface scar of 'divorce' itself is no-more a 'scar-like' at all, but the in-thing, or the 'fashion-of-the-day' itself!). 'They' say , in places like Japan, a small scar as a 'taint' even, is good-enough for a politician to step-down at once, and then scurry into oblivion, while we find it adorable! My teacher at college said 'the founder of this charitable educational institution was declared insolvent some 32 times!' (and left it to us, to guess... whether to adore it or to despise it!... The subtle message was the 'reasons', the parameters, to decide either ways, had to be reconstructed afresh, ab-initio!).

Scar-edly yours,

psn(8th July, 2014)

ps: (“Scar-edly”... was, not exactly 'scaredy' ... for, that was 'found to be' thus: “a scaredy-cat (informal)

someone who is frightened when there is no reason to be

Usage notes: This phrase is used especially by children.)

Being country-Good

We do talk of things like “Vasudaiva Kutumbakam”(Global 'family'), “Loka Samasthaa sukhino Bhavantu” (Global prosperity) , etc...

We also admire 'good' songs..... 'Apne liye, jiye tou kya jiye...'

Quite a few people try to do 'good' for others, when they feel, they owe their life to what supports this very life on this planet (deep interdependence on everything and everyone).

Individually, we are usually constrained or confined to the proximity of those around us, and hence the 'good' that we 'try' to do would reach or benefit only those close by...

As a nation... as a country... which one is 'good' to the rest of the world? I came across an interesting video talk,

http://www.ted.com/talks/simon_anholt_which_country_does_the_most_good_for_the_world?utm_source=newsletter_weekly_2014-07-05&utm_campaign=newsletter_weekly&utm_medium=email&utm_content=talk_of_the_week_button

The transcript of that talk:

http://www.ted.com/talks/simon_anholt_which_country_does_the_most_good_for_the_world/transcript

The web page of organisation that collects data and analysis a 'good' country:

http://www.goodcountry.org/

It is interesting to note that the 'good' country also happens to be the one that is said to have gone bankrupt as a nation/country, during the recent economic depression!

Now it is our choice to find out if... India ever ranked as the most-good country by these parameters, since ancient times.. If yes... then why and how?... Has it got to do something with spirituality?.. Spiritual people, or those who walk the spiritual path.. do they 'fit-in' into these parameters of 'being-good'? (interestingly, the speaker of that TED talk uses the term 'good' with a unique style of comparative degrees.. good-gooder-goodest... instead of good/better/best..!! That changes the base of its very concept!)

Not-yet...Good-enough... Yours,

psn(6th July, 2014)

Messy Mess-up

I did enjoy reading one of meanings each, of these two words, 'messy' and 'mess-up'.....

Messy = Unpleasantly difficult to settle or resolve

Mess-up = something badly botched or muddled

I had looked it up at 'thefreedictionary dot com ....

I felt a deep compassion towards some of my fellow seekers(during my days of 'volunteering' while I was engaged with ancient spiritual practices, modified to suit the present-day-mind, and thus evolved into newer-form-of-techniques), ... when I saw that they were struggling to get into a groove, to get a feel , a glimpse... of that 'meditative state' after which the very practice turns into an abundant source of inspiration!

Only then on, I paid adequate attention to people around me who frequently used to utter certain 'standard-phrases' in certain situations, where their desire for a 'positive-result' turns into a sort-of-anxiety (the 'mind' even thinks of this as a very-positive-anxiety... A few modern-Mom's provide themselves of such 'commendable/appreciable anxiety' when they try to 'bring-up' their children 'well'...!! And the kid wonders, 'am I going to have a stunted growth, especially that vertical-growth... if not for my 'mom's anxiety-syndrome' that puts me off so badly, so often?')...

“ Oh! I must succeed “... (still-worse: “ I must somehow succeed”... here the anxiety level is breaking the check-dams!)

“I must not 'mess-up' this event , and so, I must keep my 'sporadic-anger' in a check! (still worse: “ I must not become 'over-anxious' about the 'smooth' conduct of this event.. Little realising, that this “I must not become 'over-anxious'.. this 'over anxiety' is sought-to-be curbed 'only-with' an 'over-dose' of further over-anxiety!

Exam-scores-chasing-kids, would keep chanting, 'I must do well in the exam'... 'I must remember this chapter/key-words/ to 'somehow' impress the evaluator of the exam paper that 'I-do-now' this concept quite well'... (here the 'chant' ... effectively.... interrupts the 'committing-to-memory' that jargon, that un-understood, and 'yet-important' .. 'portion'.. the tick-mark, the underlining mark, the inverted commas.. is all that they manage to remember at the exam-hall, not the contents!)...

I wonder, how this 'pre-emptive-strike' by this 'positive-anxiety' is going to be countered, especially when it is about the other-person's anxiety, which is now-my-anxiety!!! All I end up doing is ... further messing-up the already-mess-up ... messy-mess-up of that other messy person!!! (It took a very long time to even understand/grasp the 'oddity' of the strange, and seemingly-untimely-comment of the teacher, when he suddenly/abruptly walked out of a meditative session , saying “Sometimes, my very presence would feel oppressive to you... so I leave this place 'physically' for a while now”...!!! I could not 'feel' the absence even!...

For us commoners, that implicit trust is a simple, handy and easy tool, to get started with, to handle this 'positive-anxiety-syndrome' (my guess!).. But again, this trust itself is an 'already-messed-up' concept, to-our/in-our understanding!!!

Under-standing-ly yours,

psn(4th July, 2014)

post script: I am a 'tube-light' perhaps! I realised a bit late, the 'deeper implication' (that positive-anxiety-syndrome's concept), though , right in my school, my English teacher quoted a saying “ I spoiled my own health, drinking to 'other's health' too often”!! There is a tradition of drinking a 'toast' with 'cheers' ... ( I was busy thinking about 'bread-toast' perhaps! English-teacher, grammar-classes, nounform, verb form mix-up/mess-up!).