A taste for dislikes!

:)
(yes, a smile-ly... that is what it evokes, when I look at myself, in the mirror of my mind, and how I kept chasing people, to look out for their 'dislikes' . :))

“I like it ONLY this way”... said another kid of my age, describing his “liking” for rice!
We both were innocent (not due to our spiritual evolvement... it was just-a-gift of that age... still idiots)... So, I asked him just-like-that (no boldness involved): “Hey, ... so you don't like rice basically... it is your 'tremendous' liking for curds that allows that 'wretch' called rice to be enveloped into coating of thick curds, and you barely manage to gulp the rice?”...
He looked confused.... a blank stare... then he confessed, “My mom compels me to eat at least some-rice... so I use curds to tolerate it” ... Ahaa! Now it is clear...

I moved on thus... observing dislike-to-another-dislike.... person-to-person...

some dislike “Maths”... some dislike “History” (may be they like only 'own-story', not His-story).. geography, language (mind you... only when language is subjected to being tested on that fellow for his proficiency... not when he hunts for choicest words of abuse to 'show' his dislike for another kid!!!)... Etc..


My kid came up one day and asked, “Tell me, what vegetable do I dislike?”...
(at first ... I thought... “Oh!... revamp of 'education' system... has it become so severe?... the teachers give 'even-such-home-works'???)...

So, I asked: “is it a home-work assignment?”

“Nah!... And, why do you assume, you are good-at, or even helpful with my homework/s?... not that... anyway... I asked mom, and she drew a blank, and asked me to run up to you with that quiz”

“But why?...” I tried....
“See... all my friends at my school, discussed during lunch hour yesterday, about their 'dislike-wala-vegetable item” he “explained”... and said, “when my turn came... I stared blank, and they had a laugh at me... and I said, 'well, I just need to look a little deeper.. even ask my parents, and shall come back with an 'accurate-list' tomorrow'... so ... that's it”
I shot back, “Tell them, you dislike almost all kinds of vegetables... just that ... at home, we buy what is 'available' and within our budget... so you, kind-of... got used to anything that is strictly-vegetarian... for that is what your folks at home are!”...
He looked at this suggestion as a 'good-compromise'... or maybe.. it fitted into his 'common-minimum-program'... and he left this 'problem' then-and-there :)

My dad was even better (than me , with my kid)... He 'bowed' to my wishes (my liking), when it came to even 'scolding'... words to scold were worded in English (medium of instruction at school).. But when I think about it now.. it ain't-exactly a dislike I had with my mother-tongue (father scolding in mother-tongue)... just-that... I would miss the 'impact-desired' , from that scolding, when part of my brain gets engaged into deciphering the meaning of the words (they use high jargon, when it comes to scolding some-kid... the spouse is 'listening' at the other end of the home, hell's-kitchen... and it may take a political-turn!!!)... Now, whatever it was.. my-dislike, or my 'differently-abled-ness/mess/etc'... I got scolded in English, and I got the 'message' seriously-enough!

My problem continued :))

I noticed... kept noticing... only then I can observe and learn...
Situation forces something as a routine... it can turn into a 'liking' in exclusivity of many other-dislikes... Shortage of oxygen in the air... (sandy deserts)... can , over a period of time, render the sensory-perception receptive to a 'taste' ... more via nose , than a tongue... Aromatic spices become the chief politicians in the kitchen of such people... not their fault.. Yes, it can become their-fault only when they 'migrate' to greener pastures, where they can evolve (over generations), into capability (ability deployed... or the other way... ain't-too-sure!) .. to use taste buds too, with equal dexterity as their noses!
Some north Indian dishes do not deserve a 'pickle' as a taste-enhancer... maybe, simply because, chillies have already pounced upon normal-dishes with the same-intensity as they did on pickled-tickled-item!..

Dislikes have a tendency to permeate into emotions too... when we get stuck into a liking for only one-sub-category of emotion! ( I do not like 'crying'... gets camouflaged into 'ability-to-laugh' at disasters!... Laughing alone won't work, do something about 'a' future-disaster!!!... Nope! My dislike doesn't allow me to 'design' a software unto that...!!!)

What does the spirit within... 'like'....?
Blank-stare...!!!

Obviously, file-attachments are denied in our email addressed to Mr. Spirit... (Oh! Is it that the spirit has a dislike towards 'likes and dislikes'???.... dunno)

Alike, yours,

psn(14th February, 2016)

Voluntary Audit

“Would you prefer to be told of your errors, mistakes, shortcomings etc... by somebody who has no authority to do so, and would therefore be a lot-more mild, kind, gentle, friendly etc...
or
would you prefer it from the boss, who can inflict consequential penal action too, carry that memory(venom), in his memory for a long time?” I asked...


It was a 'chance' I took... to see...
if I can translate my desire ...
to make a difference in the life of the fellow next to me! (a fresher is a better victim! :))

At work place... the 'book' says... seniors ought to help the fellow seated next to him to get acclimatized with the work-environment .... though the other might be quite good at work... the psyche of the clientele differs a lot from place to place.... For instance, at a village place, the 'attention' matters a little more! Tell them, 'Yep, we have seen/sighted you... and even trust you to allow us a little time to get the work done well' ... once they feel 'assured' of that attention, a little delay means nothing-at all to them... On the other hand, a busy client in a Metro city is only-concerned with quick-delivery of his requirement, ... forget those 'courtesies'...

Regular and official 'audits' do not contemplate such suggestions... they go by mere-checklists...

To gain that trust and confidence of my fellow-worker... I had to present a 'school-type' of check list... advantages and disadvantages along side :) .. Just to persuade him to allow me the 'auditor's' role into his work...
A 'voluntary' audit... I told him... is....

1. more genuine
2. the presentation of errors, weaknesses, strength-areas to be further strengthened, etc are better-presented
3. the effort to make it 'more appealing' is there (official auditor hardly bothers what the victim would 'think' about such harsh observations)
4. it is more acceptable... since it is voluntary... not a mandated checklist which may be outdated/irrelevant/impracticable/etc
5. it is coupled with a 'solution' often... auditors leave the 'battle-it-out' to higher up's with just saying 'what is not okay'...
6. it is 'more-timely'... the rectification is earlier, when damages leave a deeper scar, with official audits
7. introspection is there with the person who undertakes voluntary audit... he is inside the game, not a mere referee who doesn't need to win-or-lose :))
8. fosters that 'inclusiveness'... it is not a case of point-out-defect and just run-away!
9. Builds honesty and mutual trust ... something that a 'casual' visitor (official auditor) hardly even-looks-at
10. on going corrective measures ... just happen along side :)

Usually, they do take the 'bait'... and then a 'bond' gets established...

The 'probation' period of a fresher sails reasonably smooth...

Hey!

I thought... then it 'ought' to have been there in the ancient times!
Oh!... since the very 'priority' of a lifestyle was towards spiritual-evolvement... this 'audit' factor too was heavily shrouded, camouflaged... perhaps ... And that led me to focus a little more into it... That explained the 'flexibility' that was in built in those 'sutras' the thread... which accommodated flowers of a broad-spectrum!

Audibly yours,

psn(28th January, 2016)

Media power Versus Power via a-Media

"Media" has proved its clout, when technology powered its warhead, and they took-on the politicians....

Now it looks like ....

Media is drunk with power... ... it contemplates on showing “Gods” their place!

They take sides.... with women who insist on disrobing themselves off, of the gift that creation gave them in abundance, and taking up something of an inferior quality(given to male forms by the very same nature), in the name of 'equality' of gender... Well it is a matter of one's choice (and of-course, backed so-heavily by fundamental rights -->freedom-->constitution... etc).. ....

The drama looks too good! Wholesome entertainment....
Women at their peak intensity, asserting logic, and media 'crusading' their cause (temple entry)... while , I guess the media is 'effectively' testing its might against the very “Gods”...

Now, Gods wouldn't really oblige, by manifestly conceding a 'defeat' to the king-maker-power of Media...

Something held with great reverence... looked like a 'sanctity'....

The ancients (especially the evolved ones), were basically too-scientific... they transcended even sensory perceptions.... they started with “Zero” (the smallest possible nano-scale)... and then explored the permutations and combinations possible with its manifest macro-scale... Obviously, they found a 'pre-fabricated' structure to be far-more sophisticated to 'toy-with'... (siddhis)...

We just can do anything at all....only with what is right in front of us (even with babies, the toy has to be moved a little closer to the baby, if it has to be tempted to crawl towards it's reach )...

A wire is “no-probs”... as long as it is not “live”... bare hands, dirty-hands, wet-hands... its all the same... Enliven it with that 11K volts... and now with a dripping-wet body... some 4 inches close, not even 'touching it yet' (electrical engineers say 'too risky)...

Fortunately for us... most temples are not in its 'live-wire' status... the art of 'consecrating' it is itself got into a 'ritual' , followed blindly... no testing tools around...
Ah!... testing-tools! ...
Media has offered to be one! (or is it that .... they thought, they are good enough to take-on even the Gods!... having proved their might on Political Gods?... Dunno!)...

Medium-ly yours,

psn(26th January, 2016)

Judging Judgments

Oh!

I try to see if it is appropriate to say an “Oh!”...
It is a non-committal type of expression, which keeps the other guessing about what it meant to the fellow who let-out-that 'oh!'....

Why do 'Judgements' get so-much-delayed in a court of law?... Before I got a chance to look at the enactments which constrain a Judge to adhere-to, to continue-to earn his salary , I tried to guess 'off-track' things like.... “are the Judges too apprehensive about how their-Judgements would be judged?.. Appeals(in higher courts) are in abundance!”

Once I had a look at the set of enactments, it became clear to me that they have nothing to do with 'Judging-properly'... they merely 'administer' the law :)

And, whatever the uncertainties... the bulk of it owes to the law-experts who manage the gymnastics of 'interpretation of statutes'... at an arena/boxing-ring, where the skills of logic, coupled with little bit of diplomacy, exploiting lack of grasp(poor investigation), perception(deducing like Sherlock-Homes), etc are put to test :)

At work place, when a new 'boss' turns up... it is those people who depend-heavily upon errors of judgements of this new-boss, which is to their favor, ... who are too anxious to 'find-out'... as to how this boss is going to judge 'situations' (the list of 'why they depend so'... is not only exhaustive, but also would take our 'judgements' about this exercise a little away from our curiosity:)) .. ...}...

Getting some work done at quite a few places is so-easy! Judgements about judgements are not at all complicated... Crisp currencies dissolves all problems! No wonder, 'corruption' is so-uniquely adored!... more the admonishments attributed to this enigma, more it nourishes and nurtures its spread!

Now it 'took-me' towards yet another arena.... the home front... where I was too-badly-intrigued, when I noticed the women folk, very urgently engaged into the task of how their male-folk are going to 'judge' at domestic situations!

It helped them to smoothen out their vulnerabilities to being adjudged to their dis-favour :)

If the diner likes his dishes a little salty, add that extra salt to all the nonsense that is churned out as 'dishes'... if he likes it sweet, make those pickles-too to taste a little sweet,...

If he dislikes a 'range-of-vegetables/dishes/tastes, it is a wind-fall of blessing(!)

It at once makes the 'range of weapons' to get formidably-armed, in the event of an incursion into kitchen's comfort-zones (to hell with what happens to the health-aspect... after-all, what else is a 'family-doctor' meant for ?)...

There is that 'pre-emptive' strike-capability too... like, “my kids don't eat these dishes, so it leaves me with very little choice about being innovative at cooking :)”... and then, it muffles voices of dissidence from external-support within the family!

I do not dare-to-elaborate the predicament of 'facing' a freak in the family, who can 'tolerate' any vegetable/dish/taste, and yet is capable of discernment-at-will and by-choice, when invoked!

What happens with a mind that happens to engage itself so-incessantly thus?... Does it ever get a chance to even look at 'own-judgement-patterns'?... (the 'logic' pattern of a CPU-processor is blessed indeed, when it is not even 'expected' to take a look at its own 'basic-concepts' of judging the user's choice-patterns!.. Even techies engage their minds to 'guess' the ever-changing judgement patterns of end users!... Impatience due to delayed-judgements of processors/pipelines, is of a great concern, often!)..

Taking the focus to another field where 'judgements' seldom work....

Oh!
When it comes to striving towards planting a desire('inception-movie'?), an appeal, an inquisitiveness, a thirst, .. a-something... that is likely to turn the attention of a person who 'specialises' in judging-judgements ... the task is at once a question mark ??... where at all, to even start?

Even the 'volunteering' (for a back-up support for spiritual programs) to take firm-roots into/inside the genuinely-eager participants , became an arduous task... Failures heaped torrentially!.. But not entirely without a few side-benefits! I knew exactly, where I could go wrong with my-judgements :)

Non-judgementally yours,

psn(16th of January, 2016)

Worry

I am not so-fortunate as the students of psychiatry/psychology/or-whatever...

They have the 'licence' to look at it (Worry)... whenever they feel inclined to... It is a part of their 'official-syllabus'!... Or, just open a text book, and read-off, read-away.... whatever a 'previous-expert' has written about it...!

I cannot even look at a “worry” unless I am a little-away from it...

Because, while I am with-it... I am also in-it... it , the worry, has soaked me fully... (unfortunately, mirrors don't 'tell'... how worried I look... it can only say, whether I 'look' beautiful or ugly :))...

:)

It was thus, that I proceeded to approach 'worry'.... when I 'thought' thus: “I am not so-much worried right now...”... I felt it to be an 'opportune-moment' to try and understand : “what this worry is all about?” :)

The very word 'intellect'.. seems to suggest, that it cannot be 'stupid' :)

The body, by its very design... (nature has done it for us)... doesn't do any stupidity by-itself... (for example, it tries to simply-throw-out... what is not 'needed'... dust I inhale (my own-stupidity), and the nose instantly-sneezes... it doesn't 'wait'... to ask... “Sir, May I...?” (throw it out?)... it takes me by 'complete-surprise'... and I am so-thoroughly-embarrassed... when I sneeze before an 'elite-crowd'... I mumble “sor-ry”... some elder retorts, “bless you” (Oh!... I am blessed... the body is sensible as-yet!)

Mind.... Yesss!!! Only “a” mind can play with worries (that's what I 'experienced' :) .... it just picks about-any-time... not bothered about my priorities... it picks an 'issue'... it plays the game of a 'worry'... it engages my-attention too-badly!....
Doesn't matter if it is my sleep time too!...
At best... it gives a 'concession'... like, “Okay... it is your sleep time now.. so, for-a-change.. let's worry about-THAT... the new topic is, 'it is sleep-time... what shall I do?... I haven't finished worrying about that 'X-topic'?”...

.....

Is it my own-imagination?....
I look at 'brilliant' minds...

At school, I had a lesson , a story... about a great-mind... Shri Archimedes... he too worried... “how to find out if that crown is entirely of 'pure-gold'?...”...
No help came... Melting down that crown spoils the workmanship (art, skill... that made the crown)..
He had to get along with 'routine' at some point of time... (sleep-time, was also a 'routine')..
Early morning... bath was a decent thing to do (it must be so... for him too!)...
He is yet to 'invoke' yesterday's pending-worry...
Maybe during that 'little-silent-period' of his mind... the intellect was given a little permission to 'observe'... something that was already happening in that bath-tub , all these years!!! :)
His physical body(structure)... uneven outline... displaces water in a manner which can be 'systematically' measured, pouring it into a 'symmetrical-sized' container... it has to match his body's volume! (the rest , we know.... Eureka business... Oh yes!... we even made it into a phrase! The scene of a bath tub, is attractive enough to tempt us to remember it quite-often... Other-eureka's are too-dull-looking!)..

My next 'worry'... “Hey! Why am I not bothered to think... like...'is the sun going to rise again tomorrow?..'... Oh sure! It has always been doing... for centuries at least... Then, am I going to live to 'see-it'?... That too, seems so-probable!... The milk-man is a 'reasonable' thing to worry! Let me worry with/about ...something, which is 'my' domain :) ... Doesn't matter, even-if... my-own-worrying is not going to improve or retard the 'actual-happening' of that event... Worrying is almost like my 'fundamental-right'!... It gives me a kind-of-reassurance, that I am 'responsible' :)

Oops!... Too late before I realised.... almost anything that I take up to do.. or is thrust upon-me, (incumbent on me to-do)... firstly... it takes the shape of a 'worry'... only then I am even-allowed to take a 'look-at'... what I can do...whether I can do... whether the situation will allow me to do it (I safely call it 'a situation'... actually, it is the people around who usually create 'that-situation' for me... a compressed-set-of-problems, the west says, “hey! We have a situation now!” :)

When an observation enters me via 'intellect'... (later the mind can do what it likes with it)... that 'worry' is also-something... that I can-even-try to understand :)

Meditative-states?... worrisome-meditation?... dunno !

worrysomely yours,
psn(9th January, 2016) 

It happens only in India :)

It is one thing to 'deserve' compassion,

and it is entirely a different thing to 'extend' compassion to somebody who is yet to deserve it... (I wonder, how people would 'feel' about it when they are a recipient of such compassion, when they are yet to 'deserve' it... I found it uncontainable, when the sense of gratitude swelled within me! The 'thing' that came out of such compassion was of such great magnitude!)...

The 'pranic-force' (call it by any name... life-energy... the 'very-life-component'... soul... atma.. whatever..)... this pranic-force is so subtle, so silent-within... so inconspicuous... that it simply evades our 'feel', our experience, our perception... The mind can't comprehend it (except creating some kind of 'imaginary-descriptions' from the hearsay that we get from all around... both credible, and non-credible sources... from people dependable, and people who merely hallucinate about it ).

I can only speak of my own experience... and I can 'attempt' to keep it in mind, that others who hear it from me do find their own time quite precious... irrespective of other parameters like their own factors (factors within their control, and beyond their control), which decide a grasp of what I share, with that high-fidelity grasp (in the sense, what is sought to be told, and told, is exactly what get conveyed and understood too!)

When my dad was hospitalised, I reached only a few days later... The doctor who walked that 'extra-mile' to encroach into the other doctor's domain at the hospital, did so, because this doctor was a kid-age-friend of my dad, and professionally quite competent too, also due to being a retired Army Captain, as a doctor of course...

This Captain Doctor told me on the day of my visit, “He ought to have died at least 3 days ago! I wonder what keeps him alive till now... So, that's it... expect it any time !”... And to my surprise, my dad survived yet another dozen days !!
(I simply stored this 'diagnosis'... the medical condition , that was defied by some 'unknown' force within, the life that kept ticking in my dad's body)....

Years later, it so happened that ... during a spiritual program, we were asked to chant a set of syllables (called a 'maha-mantra'... a spiritual-formula, supposed to invoke some 'spiritual' experience, ... coming down from generations of spiritual heritage of ancient India)...

We kept chanting it all the waking hours...
It felt so-stupid... with nothing really happening... except that we barely managed to keep chanting, and while doing so.... we were rather forced to 'tolerate' the irregular, nasty-sounding chant-patterns of our-own, as well of that of others around... Fatigue is an inadequate word to describe what we felt during the third day of this 'nonsense' (it seemed to make no sense at all, merely chanting a name, by which one of the 33 crore gods were uniquely named.. like some UID of Aadhaar numbers, which carried only one main purpose, that... no two numbers are alike).

Then it happened...
I felt something strange... (I felt constrained to call it 'strange'... only-because, ... I was not familiar with anything like that before/earlier... happening within me... More than that, I did-not/could-not even-conceive of any such possibility, an experience of that kind). It evades an 'accurate' description... The nearest that I can reach is ... it felt like some very-high voltage electric current flowing criss-cross, all through my body... ... some 'strange-circle' not the 'round-circle' that we call a circle... it simply circulated all over!

Oh!
I felt that 'oh!'

All along... I was 'carrying' this 'potential'/capability/possibility/whatever... of such an experience... right within?!! Forget what 'else' it can do... (the doing-with-it, of anything-else... is that 'calculative-mind' and its cunning games in me)... just to 'have' such an experience!.. it felt awesome/amazing/what-not!!!
Tears rolled down my eyes (dunno what these tears have got , anything-to-do with this experience!)...

Then , when I 'settled-down'.... I tried to 'make-some-sense' out of it... And that is the part .. which may or may-not-be true... just a guess-work... I do know that I am 'kept-alive' due to some unknown thing (call it life-energy).... this became a bit dynamic, thanks to the 'hidden' magic in that chant which whipped up the 'force' to activate it adequately-enough to ... in-turn... 'make' the other tangible/perceivable/feel-able/whatever... things/wiring/neurons, in me ... violent enough to bring it within a 'noticeable' level for me!...

years passed... I took care not to chant that set-of-syllables in that 'prescribed' way, unless told to... (a kind of reverence crept in... we don't play with switches that control nuclear-devices :)...). Then, on 'designated' days... when it was okay to chant it a few times, I started doing it, a bit mildly...

on one such day (rather, it was a 'night-time')... a person very close to me, asked me to stop-chanting it.. this person, I knew... had suffered the after-effects(side-effects), of prolonged and heavy-medication... which takes a toll on the nerves... It was so-easy-now... to 'grasp' what becomes of nerves... when it gets abused (for whatever holy-reason too).. over a period of time... It simply means... that when ancients called something 'asur'... they were perhaps referring to the non-synchronicity of a 'normal' functionality of the 'manifest form of life energy within' :-))

And then.... I really don't know... what else this particular thing did with me, this experience! Too clustered to single-out and relate each experience with each notch that marked the spiritual journey!

I leave it to the readers to decide, what to make out of what I shared as my experience (But yes, I have adequate-enough reasons, to tell-myself... that I was not entirely wrong, in attempting to 'eat-up' the quality-time of others!)...

Oh yes!... That caption “it happens only in India”... is rather a figurative expression only... to symbolise that 'rich , ample, and generous' life-style, or way-of-life, that we later started referring to as 'Hinduism'... and to feel proud of, when we have Masters, who managed to make it a 'structured' happening, when it does happen all over the globe, but only as a matter of chance!

thus, yours,
psn(5th January, 2016)

Eureka Moment

What an excellent piece of 'evidence'!

It is a functional phrase now! Nothing to do with that 'principle' which was discovered (http://www.thefreedictionary.com/eureka+moment )

A logical discovery it was... propounded as a theory in physics... One among many such discoveries.

The mind which discovered it, found an expression of a very deep emotion, in that exclamation, “Eureka”....
And when it is a deep emotion, the expression finds an instant appeal...!
(Politicians do make a 'full-use' of it... when they are gifted with the ability to make an emotional-speech... doesn't matter whether they fulfill their election-promises or not... it is good-enough to fool us for a while, till the votes are cast !).

Yes... I could notice that this discovery (now, whatever it was... let us not embarrass ourselves, 'risking' to ask the 'precise' details of what that discovery translates into, in physics!)... this discovery, found a greater popularity, merely because of the 'expression' of emotion in 'Eureka'!

And so, I was tempted to take a re-look at my own 'bundle-of-memories'...

Deeper the emotional experience, better the memory-retention!

The question is who becomes the source of inflicting that emotional-impact!!!

When we are vulnerable to certain “kinds” of insults... (a few of us do have bizarre items which cause deep-emotional-insults, much to the surprise of the others)... the 'storing' of it , into our instant-recall-memory-area ... is quite easy!

Kids find it too difficult to relate a few 'dry' lessons at school, emotionally with themselves... Unless some 'dramatized' effect is added to such lessons, committing it to memory is difficult.. They use a few tricks, if they are lucky to think of it... like ascribing some funny sound with a difficult spelling-word, etc...

“Good” piece of advice... evaporates too fast!... This, despite the emotional appeal that we found while that advice was imparted unto us... ! It fails 'only' when it was too-badly required to be remembered!.. Some other emotion ought to be conflicting with its 'sanctity' too badly, and thus nullifying/neutralizing its 'functionality' when actually-and-crucially needed!

Some emotions (yes, the related-memory-items associated with it), become a 'routine' part of us!.. We do not need any visuals even... a mere mention-of-it is good enough to bring a very strong experience of virtual-reality at any given point of time! (Some people feel a 'vomiting' sensation, by merely 'hearing' about a set of words... which makes a 'complete-sense' only-to-them, not to a grammar-teacher :) ! That is how these emotion-filled-memories re-act with us !)...

The sudden death of a parent, for want of good medical attention 'becomes' such a deep emotional memory item, that... the kid doesn't need any external source to motivate this kid, into becoming a 'doctor', no matter what kind of hurdles that kid faces on the way to becoming a medico!.. This piece of 'eureka' just keeps floating on the surface of the mind, during the entire waking period almost!

The spiritual quest, when it takes root into the person, to become an insatiable thirst... it is so-strange that ... other emotion-driven memories do not seem to have that 'grip' which we find in most people around! ( I found a rare kind of question on a forum, 'Yahoo answers', where an asker is actually challenging his own 'emotional' disposition, its inappropriate-looking-response, when the expression of a deep negative emotion, and the event related to it, turns in an opposite direction, when the recall of the event is conveyed to a listener!... Maybe, this person has not been fortunate enough to 'notice' or become aware of something much more precious that has taken-root within, namely, the 'distancing' of the being from what we call as 'my-mind', and 'my-body', etc !)...

details of that question (for somebody who is keen to take a closer look at this example :)...)
https://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20160101012811AAAXvye

Is it normal that i make jokes when I tell others about my terrible past?

For example, a few days ago, I told my best friend about what my past was like. (Physical abuse, sexual abuse, etc.) She was quite alarmed when she noticed that I wasn't crying or frowning as I spoke. She said it was almost making her feel uncomfortable because I spoke of such horrible situations with a smile, at times. Don't get me wrong, I didn't enjoy any of the abuse. I was, however, talking as if we were having a normal conversation about, say, a silly joke. I haven't realized I did this until my friend told me about how I acted as if I thought it were a joke that I had been abused as a child. Then it hit me, as I began to recall the past few times I have told others. I acted the very same way for them as I did for her. Is there something wrong with me?

Unquote...

The best part is... “Is there something wrong with me?”.... !!!
The 'mind' finds it safer to adopt to a popular pattern!...
It pays a price that is too heavy!

Perception potential... !

Emotions are merely the manifest-forms of intuitive aspects of a mind... and it does help for that memory-storage functions... Intellect functions better when emotions are 'really' tamed!

The teacher 'knows' ... the 'arduous' aspect of his task... when he sets about to invoke a spiritual-awakening into a keen disciple, who comes armed with that 'emotional' inspiration, for a spiritual-experience!

Momentarily yours,

psn(2nd January, 2016)

Disrespect towards 'respectfulness'

“It is ironical Madam”... I said, in a serene voice, “that your counterpart had earlier done just the opposite of what you showed as a great-gesture!”....
And I added, “he was looking away elsewhere while he shook hands with an underdog, that is me, just because he needed to be done-with-it, as quickly as possible... and I was almost tempted to tell him, 'Sir, I didn't come all the way to your ivory-tower to feel the shake of your palm, then why ridicule a insignificant creature like me thus?'.... but somehow I easily managed avoiding a waste of time... he didn't deserve to be told !”

Now this “Madam”... got up, shook my hands yet again, but this time with a deep-apology, “who ever it was, I apologise to you on his behalf, and humbly request you to continue doing the good-job that you are already doing so amazingly”

This was the scene at work place, and that 'Madam' was a visiting dignitary from our Head Office... the local top-boss was thoroughly embarrassed at my abrupt dialogues, but he felt reassured with that 'Madam's' response, that .... he wouldn't face any 'music' for having appreciated my work to her, while the customary introduction was made.

I somehow got accustomed to not looking-out for any 'gesture' of respect from others... 'please leave me alone' is all that I pray, when I am intensely involved with something that 'deserves' great reverence!

Maybe, I am quixotic... and that is why I find that when reverence is trusted well, a show-of-respect can be dispensed with!

A few traditional outlooks coming down from ancients, also seem to hint towards such a 'theory'...

The distinctions between 'sakha-bhakti', daasya-bhakti'...(and other forms of devotion/bhakti)... seem to also-indicate the levels of 'reverence' where that 'respectful-gestures' are almost dispensed with!

When respect-related-gestures lose its symbolism, and get reduced to mere rituals, the possibility of this 'respect' to work as a tool towards imbibing a 'deep-reverence', towards the respected-something, is lost...

and now,

the 'vulnerability' is all about a 'disrespect' taking shape deep within, towards this 'show-of-respect' !

(I had a school-classmate , who was excellent in mimicry... he used to amuse us, by mimicking a show-of-respect, gesturing with hands, while the words that he mumbled was some colloquial abuse, but the 'flow' and sound of words resembled a popular form of respectful-words... He demonstrated it by acting it out, with a drill-master who was disliked by most kids for his unkind behaviour towards children.. This classmate , when I asked, said, 'No, I wouldn't do this with our dear teachers, for whom my respect is from the bottom of my heart!'... ).

When respect for 'elders' turned into a compulsive diktat thrust upon kids, (especially girl-children), into a 'respect for age'... that tool-ingredient in those gestures of respect got dull-edged, and the possibility of 'reverence', its nurture and growth got faded out , from our traditional customs, and now, these items of 'respect' look like subservience, slavery etc! Even idols were not spared!

Respectfully yours,

psn(29th December, 2015)

'Nature' for a dummy (that's me)!

Obviously, this whole thing is about me, with me, and for me too...
Then why the hell, do I waste a reader's time?....

I don't intend to...

But yes, there could be a few who do like to collect data out of 'specimen' like me, for their own study/research purpose (or, whatever!)....

'Nature study' was imposed into my school curriculum, but only in a combination with 'and Hygiene'... very soon, this nomenclature got transformed, when I got pushed into higher classes! Yep! That is how I am tempted to look at it, when the 'progress' report proclaimed me as 'promoted' instead of 'passed' to the next 'standard' :)

I happened to notice that 'nature' does push me around all the time! Weather, climate, air and its pollution, seasons and its timings (volume/duration of daylight ) does affect my own behaviour to a large extent, and I do struggle to keep pace with its 'pushes'....

Someday, it would not push me anymore...

This aspect ought to have been 'examined' by the 'scientific-community'... in-depth... with the reverence it does-deserve! Where as, I found a few unscientific/less-scientific people like Mr.Venkataraman delving deep into the intricate aspects of death, and quite understandably, nature obliging him with due 'pass' to the next level by its-own-standards! (Yes, I did hear about that Bubble chamber experiment, and the Nobel award it had fetched... but that did not take us the common-man too far... Maybe it is too much, to compare it with gadgets like a mobile-handset, which the scientific community ensures it's reach into the hands of even partially impoverished common-man! Who am I to pick 'faults' of the 'scientific' minds, when all that I managed all-along was a nominal-promotion !)...

That took me (to look), towards the ancients ! Mercifully, they do not 'adjudicate' me anymore, and nature has quietened them (though their silence has its perpetual effect in many subtle ways!)

The 'rituals' that they advocated (having practised and experienced it at humanly-possible depths)... seemed to be aimed at pushing the human-species into a level, transcending nature, and not by-passing it!.. It was obvious that the 'choices' that are bestowed by mother-nature into the very-human-form, ought to be revered, while 'formulating' these rituals!!! The declaratory truths were a sort of 'check-points' to guide a traveler on his way, to verify, if he had been maintaining his 'bearings' properly, and nothing more! These truths cannot be 'used'... one can only be-with-it!!! So, these declarations cannot be equated with the scientific formulae that one 'uses' to solve riddles of life, puzzles, problems of mathematics etc... The bulk of their declarations, and its explanations seemed to get inclined towards 'absolute' and therefore, ... to me .. they seemed to be like a 'possible' bridge for a willing explorer to travel from the empirical plane into the absolute one! (Oh! Absolute 'one'?... maybe, that 'zero' or shoonya seems more appropriate!)...

When this became a 'little' clear to me... I saw no point in trying to 'oppose' nature in anyway... But yes, I can strive towards becoming less available to the 'vagaries' of nature... And to me, even my fellow-humans did appear 'as-natural' as the other life-forms that I see around, since the choices we were given was a game-plan of 'nature' itself... Now if we choose to look at ourselves to be 'superior' to nature, ... well, that too is a choice!... And who else, except our own dear mind, that can decide so? :)

That .... now seems to help me to make 'well-considered-decisions'... having exhausted all my quixotic games, (out of sheer curiosity), to see what happens, when I 'ask' nature to oblige me at times! (and yes... she did... the mother-nature... in strange ways though!... after all, she too was obliged several times by her boss, the absolute 'one'!)...


quietly yours,

psn(26th December, 2015)

Honesty within

“How to get rid of that guilt-feeling?”... somebody asked me!

Being honest about it... (was the 'logical' answer which would give me a 'win', but would be of no practical use for that asker, since... it was already-that-honesty .... about-it,..... which had even raised that guilt-feeling :))

Now, 'accepting' guilt doesn't help... in fact it worsens it... Yep! I am truly-guilty, is what that 'acceptance' does!

Oh! these terms.... 'honesty'.... 'about it'... 'acceptance'.... they at times add to the confusion, instead of solving it :)

And that 'guilt'..???

Yes, it is used profusely in a court of law....
The Judge is eager to know, whether the 'convict'... pleads 'guilty' or 'not-guilty' ?

Some provision of the law is .... flouted/contravened/disobeyed/or-whatever... and therefore some word is needed to define that 'going against the law'... the word 'guilty' suits fine!

But why do I 'find' myself .... so-guilty... when the dinner leaves a left-over?

Yes, I did eat lesser than usual.... and I have my very-strong-reasons... obviously all of them only-in-my-favour :)

“only” ? (in my favour)....
There is the catch! I convince the 'other'... thoroughly... but I know too well, I was 'guilty' of contributory-negligence :)

Thus we (perhaps), keep accumulating that small doses of 'guilt'... unspelt thought forms... which erodes our own integrity unto ourselves... deep enough, .... and one day, we find that we do not trust even ourselves!... We still keep trying, saying that we have 'reasons beyond our control' (meaning, we rendered ourselves unto.... 'no control on our-own-selves'...).

A chain reaction is set into motion thus! (maybe, it all started with 'trying-to-be' on the right at all times!)

It made me wonder now!

In the ancient times, nobody enjoyed any 'rights'.... (the way we assert it against the government, quoting constitution of the Country, democracy, etc...).

Instead, there were only the 'duties'... when people recognised ... they owe it back to whom they got it from, what they had! (it all boils down to 'nature'... when everybody and everything was a part of nature)... And when we find bound by duties... duty-only.... the others around have it from us as a sort-of-right... a privilege... from us . Yes, they too in turn, do something similar! Now, that reduces the need of litigation to a great extent.. The bulk of what we call as 'administration' and/or governance... is just about ensuring the right for an individual, from the rest of them around, collectively! Taxes, licences, security-structure, reservations, .... all these are rights of an individual, to be snatched out of others around! And we individuals hand over our 'so-called-rights' into the hands of a few... whom we trust, quite helplessly! (that's democracy :))....

And we scratch our heads, to find out why the 'society' is so-corrupt, and where we went wrong, etc... Till we 'find' it out (our wrong)... a question of that 'guilt' doesn't arise at all! :))

So that works well!

Confuse ourselves very consciously, skillfully... pile up a lots and lots of contradicting 'adages', and escape that 'guilt'!...

Unless there is a 'provision'... framed.... by ourselves... and we disobey it... where is 'guilt'?

(“Sin”, seems to precede a guilt... so create something.... define something that constitutes a 'crime' when that 'created-something' is not complied with... now call it either a 'sin', where law has no say .... or call it a 'guilt' , where law says-something :)..... And, when something is 'as-per-law', only an authority can forgive... but when something is 'escaping' the laws... anyone can forgive, usually it is ourselves!

Interestingly... the ancients did not coin an appropriate word for things like 'forgive',... 'guilt' ... etc... (the sense of duty dominated so strongly.... they obviated the need of adjudication by others around... and had the 'good-sense' to trust others, when own adjudication seemed lacking that depth-of-perception, to get to the 'real' bottom of the truth!... )
We find in those scriptures, only the 'declaratory-truths'... leaving it to the choice, entirely to an individual... whether to explore, and then accept it, or to ignore it! So, it was a bad choice, or a good choice... but not a guilt!

At any given point of time, if I do my very-best... what else can I ever do? (that is being at least to an 'animal-level'.... and then, ... hopefully,.... I would evolve beyond the animal level) :))

Guilt-edged, yours,

psn(10th of December, 2015)

Examination of Examples!

As a school kid, I used to love “examples” in the school text books!

The only place where the person (whom we kids 'regarded' as far-more-intelligent than 'even-the teacher'), who wrote the text book, shows his kindness to we-the-kids ... quite liberally... So easy to understand that, even the teacher just ignores the scope to 'further' elaborate an example :)

That was what an 'example' was... any other 'show' of what 'something-would-be-like'... was only a 'sample' (a mild caning on the outstretched palm, by elders, for instance would tell us the trouble in-store for the trouble-we-cause :) ... beware!)

It was the 'easiness' of the examples in maths text book, which made the 'sums' (the problems caused unto us kids, with a very funny-title “Exercise”) look 'far-more-tough' than what it really is!... Reading that 'examples' again and again felt like some wasted-effort, once we had decided that problem to be an 'impregnable-fortress'!

It was thus, we ourselves wove that thick covering over the event called “Examination” :)

The scare created by the teachers and 'parents' was alike, about the thing called 'examination'... It never really occurred to us to even 'examine' the name called 'examination'! The 'process' was utterly simple, and self-explaining, (if only we had the patience to look at it as a two-in-one, example of examination!)...

Years later, I had visited 'north' (where I had worked for a livelihood, for a decade)... this time, for fun...
There, my colleagues and their family had gathered to have a dinner with us (my family was the 'minority-community' and as guests-too, within that drawing room of the 'owner-among-hosts' )....

The kids just played around, with no other visible-purpose known to them for 'such a gathering'...

One of my colleagues, who happened to 'remember' me as an 'example' of how good a motivator can be, (when he struggled with 'promotion' test become a clerk like me), suggested to me “Hey, why don't you speak a few words of motivation/inspiration/whatever-nonsense... to our kids here?.. the schools of this small town does not seem to nurture that-kind-of academic competition like large towns/cities etc”...
And, not waiting to know if I am at least inclined, he proceeded to gather the kids around, and placed me at the centre of that small circle! (With hunger in the stomach, and a delicious fragrance emanating from the dishes, on that large dining table, with the lids kept partially open, ... a very wrong time to indulge into lenghty 'lectures'... I and we the kids knew well!)...

The other negative factor was... the kids are unlikely to gather around thus, a 'next' time!

So, that squeezed me into an unenviable discomfiture of compulsion to squeeze whatever I had to say, into very brief words!

After a few 'initial' gimmicks to 'get-their-attention'... I asked “for whom is that 'exams' at our schools?”... the kids said, “us the kids!! who else ?... ain't we the sole-sufferers? :) ..”
I asked “Really?... Please take a look at it again... That 'driving-test' by RTO , who gives a licence, if we 'pass'... He likes to know, 'if we can drive safely'... and the licence tells that policeman(on behalf of public) later, that we do-know 'how to drive safely'... But, when do we know, if we can drive?... Or, ... when do we propose-to-learn to drive?.. On the eve-of-test?”

They gaped... they seemed to be able to afford themselves a chance for the concept of 'examination' to percolate into them in a 'user-friendly' manner!

I nudged it further into a proper-groove, with a brief utterance “Oh! To me, it looks like.. that exam is either for the teacher (to know how well he taught), or for the parent to know how well the kid had learnt what was taught... etc... but nothing to do with the examinee... who is just a specimen, a sample on the examination-table!”... They had a hearty laugh!

I left it to their choice to ... 'further-examine' the distortions forced upon the sanctity of the concept called 'examination' by everybody around, whether knowingly or not, willingly or not, etc..

Some neighbour drinks to death... spoiling his liver... etc... He is a 'live' example (unlike those deceptively simple examples in the maths text book, which doesn't 'exactly' tell me how to deal with 'tricky' sums!)... he is a living or a dying example (whichever way )... of how 'drinks' can only-spoil, and not nurture health... when we over do it...

Somebody continues the 'growth' in a linear direction, when the nature-designated vertical growth ceases to oblige him.... an example of what it can do with our 'freedom' of movement, health etc!

Hey..... if I fail to examine these 'samples' as my-examples... I fail in my-exam... negative results!

Now came the tough part... I had to 'examine' how well I examine! (Each breath seems an 'example-afresh', that I am alive!.. It is my-examination, whether I pass or fail, when I pass by, failing to notice it... to decide whether I 'examine' well, this 'pull' of life.. exam-pull/example!)

Sample of yours,

psn(29th November, 2015)

Right versus Rights!

Oh!

Had it been the other way... :(
That we didn't have to face the 'nature' around , armed the way we are with our right and rights!....

Perhaps, life would have been much easier :)

Not that it is easy with people... Just that it feels easier with people, than with nature.. and that prompts us to keep trying at it!... {We even forget, that the 'people' too are a part of the 'nature' too, with the exception of robotics :)... and at subtle levels, they too are, for sure!}...

Am I right? (am I correct?)...
is this not my right ? {fundamental rights enshrined in constitution... or , by virtue of my brutal power, which is a threat to the other.... like 'the one holding a gun at me is always right :)... etc}

Why at all do these two matter?... the two kinds of rights?... other life forms do not refer to them at all... {But we, ... how often?... Just look at the nature of our thoughts! Yes, in-the-light-of this right/rights :) .... }

The problem doesn't seem to end there!

The 'rights' seem to even dominate the need-even to verify the correctness-wala-right :)
And it begins, and even stays throughout, with the fundamental-right of 'expression'... Vote-bank politics thrives on this 'freedom' of expression, and media business flourishes due to this !

Well, spirituality is supposed to be about 'transcending' nature...
Then obviously, we need to adhere to nature's rules, a little... Nature doesn't recognise our right-&-rights ... Our only 'right' is to align ourselves the 'right-way', that nature allows us, to be natural... (our natural state!.. within).
Maybe, one of the reasons, the ancients never felt the need to look at being-right, and asserting-rights, the way we keep-doing today!... Dunno!

I try to wonder... what if we people, for a while... just 'try' to focus on “is it the really-right thing?” (without interference by our mind, even at its subtlest levels, about asserting our rights about it, in any way or form)... Oh!... it seems to ask for too much, really! Why else would those Nobel prize be awarded later on to an other person who successfully negated the earlier Nobel laureate? Somewhere the right and rights got badly mixed up, pushing the functionality of the intellect's pure form to a little back-ground ! Would it not have been better, if not easier, to start off with the “discoveries” of the subtlest forms that is possible,...... that nothingness!.. Dunno!

Anyway,
I guess, it is a worth-exercise... to try at least... to see if it works... very consciously allowing that 'was it the right thing' to have a say over our-rights to assert that we are invariably-right-always!

(Incidentally, my teacher camouflaged this 'concept' in one of the exercises, and the double-camouflage was ....that he shrouded it even from a discovery that it was the core-element that would even decide the success rate, that we would 'possibly' taste .... at a spiritual program!)

Wrongly.... and-yet, yours,

psn (20th November, 2015)

The 'why' of our actions...

It is too difficult to 'guess' .... why a person does something regularly/frequently...

I loved the game of caroms... But, it was not as a sport.... not for health(physical or mental).. ... not for entertainment... etc.. There was a 'hidden' agenda ! But as a consequence.... I could not avoid the incidental benefits... Skill improved...

People felt, I ought to participate in 'tournament'... they just pushed me into it.. a few prizes came in... There again, my hidden agenda worked better, when I could 'very-keenly' observe other players on a regular-basis!

One such player friend said, "Do you know... there are a few people , who just mastered the skill at this game for 'purely' their bread & butter/livelihood... ?"

I normally wait... for the other to finish saying something... (lucky that I do.. else I would have missed to get the corollary-wala-comment, which, for me.. was more educative !)

He added...

“they do not bother to play it as a 'game'... they do not participate in any tournament.. they just sit in a rented room, at a prominent place, and wait for 'customers'...
The 'customer'... is usually a carom-lover!...
They (the customers)... for example...place two white coins 'stuck' at the centre of the opposite edge, a black one sandwiched tightly between the two whites.. Now, this 'bread winner' has to 'attempt' to somehow-pocket that black in a single stroke with the striker (as per the rules of the game)... If he does it, he earns the rupee note offered as a 'bet' by the customer... if he fails, he has to pay-back double of it (2 rupees), to that customer... Usually, he does pocket it.. and the customer is 'entertained' watching the skill!”

I smiled...
I now asked this 'player-friend' “what has prompted you to share this with me?”
He said, “I have been watching you at the game, for nearly some 8 years now... I couldn't guess your real-motive, for pursuing this game... You just walked out, too-casually, when a win was certain, just because the opponent became desperate and turned glaringly-unethical, and even the appeal of 'tournament-committee' did not impress you ( later, the 'secretary' decided to sponsor a special-prize, during the 'prize distribution ceremony'... and even that turned into a politics!.. But a politician was the chief guest... so he handled that 'politics' well, saying, “I will bear the cost of this prize, ... so no more allegations of 'misuse' of sports-funds”... )...”
he continued... “ you were never disappointed by loses of games... it never affected your performance at the game!... that intrigued me!.. I felt, you do look 'closely-similar' to those 'bread-winners'... though you do not intend to make it a living, or a source of fame etc!... “
He summed up saying.. “perhaps, you might now be persuaded to share your real-intent!”...

“Oh!”.. I said.. “it is no big-secret... Just that.... I thought nobody around might be interested in my-interest-in-it :-))
It so happens, this game serves like a 'mirror' of my mind's steadiness... that is all... and I guess, it leaves no choice about whether other's too are going to be 'even-aware' of this aspect... it works on others too , quite similarly!”...

Now, this whole exercise ... spread over these years... even opened up the possibility to take a look at 'not-so-well-polished' mirrors of other kinds too... Almost any activity, its object, its objective, etc.. do provide a 'mirroring-effect'..
Slowly, the intricate inter-meshing, inter-weaving ... of how we respond, through our actions, revealed its innermost secrets to me!

Spiritual masters, do try to find out the 'why' of a disciple's keenness to undertake a spiritual quest... (And, I was interested in their 'how they do it'... the finding it out!)

Therefore yours,

psn (14th November, 23015)

Joyousness of an occasion

Ever since the ancient times, the known stories of mankind tells us of conscious efforts towards reviving that feel of joyousness periodically.

The periodicity snowballs and shapes itself into a ritual and tradition that belongs to the race of that region... The commonality of such ritual strives towards perfecting the possibility of its happening... It is thus, that the 'available' technology comes into its play :)

Today, when the symbolism itself is lost, even a very prominent occasion of manifesting our joyousness like 'Deepavali' seems to fail to evoke a genuine inner experience.. ...

We now seem to struggle even with simple acts like greeting others!

This is what I felt, when I saw a spate of copy-pastes pouring into my handset (that 'smart' version of phone), and I found myself gaping at some talent of some unknown techie who lights up the screen to create a make-belief sense of that joy!

Sweets are outsourced.. (But it brings along with it, a lot of uncertainties, in the form of health hazard, when the ingredients are trying to maximise the profit margins!)...

Even those fire crackers , which I saw as a kid being prepared 'then & there' at a remote village of Andhra where my 'well-to-do' aunt and her family generously distributed to the people around to en-Joy in togetherness, has now become a thing of anxiety, when some imported and cheaper version causes more injuries to the health of innocent kids (the 'central' government felt constrained to publicize an advertised 'warning' to be wary of such harmful fire-crackers! So that's the greeting now! Only soldiers in a big war used to be greeted thus, when they prepare to face the 'front' line of a conflict with the other nation!)....

It is not entirely without 'any benefit'... the following few weeks would for sure benefit a lot of hospitals, and doctors, and keep them quite busy :)

On my part, I felt it to be a duty towards my own 'self' to re-examine, whether all those spiritual exercises that I had undertaken this-far, had failed to evoke even a bare minimum of that joyousness that was assured of, when the ancients had 'marked' this phase of moon to become an occasion and an event, taking into account all the factors that are going to contribute positively towards it ?...

Well, even my task becomes a bit-arduous, when I could not manage to relocate myself (that forest hermitage, a Vaanaprastha)....where I ought to belong at this 'stage of life' or at this point of time (age wise), again due to external factors, more so :)

And it is only therefore, that in 'addition' to it, I need to discount the other social factors before affording myself, a 'sense of Justice'... Oh! This very 'approach' seems to afford myself the 'sense of Joy', that I am not quite off-the-track! I can overlook so-easily the inability to feign a reciprocal greeting, matching that of others, since the 'form' of joyousness that I experience evades a description that carries a popular sense!

Wishing for ourselves (all-of-us, so that I get included with you).. the true sense of Joyousness that belongs to our spirit, as enshrined by our ancients who marked this occasion (this annual phase of the moon), to bring forth unto us, ... a very happy Deepavali !

Joyously yours,

psn(10th November, 2015)

Diplomatic Answers

Politicians engage in it (diplomatic answers) most of the time....

To say an 'yes' to this observation, it doesn't need our-own-diplomacy :)

But, try to be 'diplomatic' with an expert attorney who cross examines us as a 'crucial' witness in a case involving an alleged crime of massacre of a huge magnitude! Even the Judge is wary of not-objecting to it (that diplomatic answer...).. Every body is concerned to get to the bottom of 'the' truth!

“Never try to lie to a doctor and a Vakil” ... it just means, diplomacy doesn't save ... (the 'other' side is anyway going to get at you!)....

And yet,
we find quite a lot of us, engaged into such 'diplomacy' most of our waking hours! (Hey, even here I am being a little diplomatic!... Was it 'quite a lot of us'?... or.... ? well ... :) a smiley is the diplomacy !)

A sentence is a group of words that makes a 'complete' sense... (when I took upon myself a spiritual journey, I had to re-examine the nature of sentence, in a 'yet-another-way' ... :)... Every valid sentence is a kind of conclusion, assessment, judgement etc... one way or the other!...
And it is always ... only a 'mind' that would churn out a sentence.. That is verbal thoughts!... When such 'sentence-wala' thoughts are 'conspicuously-absent'... we tend to 'claim' that our mind was 'blank'!... Really?

Really-so, is it ?

When I looked around , just sitting on the chair, comfortably seated.... not a sentence-wala thought.. for a few moments... it did 'seem'... as if I too was 'blank'... a mind that is still... I just glanced around... a 180° turn, with no specific purpose ... there was nothing in it... but then a question occurred “what if, there was one object in that room, which the mind could not 'identify'?”... (like some new alien creature made a small movement at a corner?)... The glance-across would have applied an instant-brake at that object/creature/whatever!...
It simply translates thus: 'the mind 'identified' every single object in that hall/room, and applied a well-known-label... or an algebraic-label (let us call it 'x'..!!) at least...
This labeling... is it not a complete sentence (not exactly published by the mind-yet?)?.... The 'process' of identifying... does it not involve a huge thought-process, involving a vast amount of data exchange?... The data base of memory provides the label... I tried to imagine the 'codes' if it were written down in a design-format, instead of 'low-level-language' which computers use as a default-template of its embedded system!

Oops!... Non-verbal thoughts!!! The size is incomprehensible!

Well, in that case... try with verbal thoughts , as an humble beginning... I felt...

That is when I looked at diplomacy... diplomatic answers... :-))

Diplomacy is a very good tool... to get along with worldly-life... but when it is not really-warranted, a habitual-offender finds the spiritual journey difficult, when this diplomacy works like a spoke in the wheels! (Healthy relationships, obviates any kind of diplomacy in its interactions... The chief-of-armed forces was being undiplomatic, when he said, "I fear all we have done is to awaken a sleeping giant and fill him with a terrible resolve.".. as the 'result' of attacking the opponent by surprise, and inflicting huge damage to lives and property! https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Isoroku_Yamamoto%27s_sleeping_giant_quotation )

Is/are... our 'answers' to questions asked-or-unasked.... (even answers within ourselves... more-so, within-ourselves)... 'the' bare truth?... was my concern (my-own, of course... applies only to-me, and for-me! That's diplomacy again :) ...)

The mind feels 'throttled' initially... 'acceptance' faces a 'genuine' challenge... diplomatic-acceptance collapses!

If we sustain, and manage to cross over that breaking-point... prioritising becomes a little effortless!

When people around (or we ourselves , within), try to ask for 'why-so'... the answers often turn a little diplomatic,... and truth is avoided... if not avoidable, it is camouflaged... if not possible, it is at least sugar-coated... to make it as soft as possible on the listener! It is only when relationships are not relevant, with the other... we are 'blunt'!... Now, when it is our own internal relationships, within ourselves, with ourselves... is it not our-mind that needs the pampering?... Then, that-diplomacy assumes sophistication!... When we decide, diplomacy doesn't work any more within-ourselves... acceptance dawns!.. When acceptance doesn't find any resistance, it deepens!

I leave it to the readers, to try to find out for themselves, their 'areas' and expertise at such superfluous diplomacies... My indicative examples would seem too stupid, primitive and non-enthusing!

Diplomatically yours,

psn (6th November, 2015)

Anti Intellect

“You muff..!!!”

My maths teacher at school used to chide kids who seemed like they are 'refusing' to grasp what he was trying to hint at....

It was not that they were 'really' refusing to grasp.... There was something about their attentiveness, which failed to open the doors of a 'grasp'.. and the teacher grew restless!

Theirs was the kind of appeal for : 'Hey! Why not tell me an easier way out?'....
So it is the 'conflict of interests' that bring out the negative emotions as formidable weapons against each other....

This 'drama'(the conflict of interests) ... we get to see quite often in our adult life, when ever a situation arises which offers no solutions under the category of a 'standard-protocol' :)

Just once, he decided to use an opposite of that muff... He called me 'genius'...
My immediate concern was 'why did he choose to call me so?'... My marks (the usual yardstick used by the adults around) had never given any hint towards it even by a stray chance (not even some freak scores!... It was a 'steady' average!)...

Simultaneously, I became inquisitive about what makes a person a 'genius'?...
Certainly not that hectic practise which only improves the dexterity, or an expertise...
So, an expert need not be a genius, and... a genius need not be an expert too!

It has to do with that 'intellect' , I presumed...

I kept it 'pending'... (I had to... because, even the botany/biology never made a conspicuous mention of 'intellect' as yet!.... )

Spiritual path dealt ( only-with).... at being intelligent (again my guess work only! When mind, its logic and even emotions, do not interfere, the perception).... Just that while at work, the intellect needs to find itself becoming more subtle to a point where it 'happens' to even transcend the sensory perceptions ! The teacher seldom speaks about being 'intelligent' !... Maybe he 'knows'... that anyway, that is what it is going to boil-down-to :) Otherwise, the instructions to 'maintain' alertness during the 'seemingly-stupid' activity of breath-watching, doesn't seem to really take us anywhere at all... especially so, during early stages... ! It is only a tenacious persistence that makes us aware of even the 'conflict' between the mind (its memory, imagination, via logic and emotions), trying to almost-dissuade us from the 'futility' of an activity like 'watching' the breath, when body is already/sufficiently intelligent enough to do that job quite efficiently :)

It was during the hectic years of volunteering that I could start noticing the 'denouncing' aspect of innocent aspirants towards their own intellect!

Society, when it is driven by its materialistic pursuits-only, also seems to actually-compete towards who does it better, when asking people not to be intelligent!

The gadgets which are 'meant' to make our lives quite easy, seem to actually ask us to go-easy... a little-more(little and more ?)... on our intellect, than the physiology-related-stressful tasks...

Most of the medical innovations seem to work at our cellular level intelligence almost in the same way! (and we are 'told' that micro organisms are becoming more-intelligent than our anti-biotics!). Are we not trying to get rid of 'pain' at the drop of the hat?... Then why is a pain-sensation being tested to look for a presence of 'life' ? Dunno...
The swelling at some insect bite, with some 'heat' around it, ..... and the pain to draw our attention for additional help... is met with a 'putting-down' of the symptom related to all of it... the very symptom of any pain ... at once reminds us of pain relievers!.. and we just forget about ...what could be its 'source'! Now the source of trouble remains safe within, to do its own multiplication quite silently, clandestinely, and then manifest in some other form at a time which suits it most... and the suitability being the ease of gulping our own physiology, its ready-structure, which is the most sophisticated of manifest-life-forms... If this is true/correct... then, obviously, we are giving-ourselves-in, to lesser 'intelligence' of life-forms :)..;...!

When the mind becomes incisive, it turns beautiful... and the 'women' behind every successful mind is the intellect.. at subtle levels, intellect is resplendent with a feminine grace, I guess!

I even wonder if the 'famous' I.Q. tests are really a conclusive or comprehensive tool to measure its liveliness!

Foolishly yours,

psn (25th October, 2015)

Education System

(The entire approach is purely my guess work... and hence heavily speculative... At best, the benefit ... any... is only likely to be about the 'methodology' of approach... A thing, a concept, often ignored)...

The base of it , reasonably 'ought' to navigate around handling 'life' and aiming at evolving further.

The 'need' to revamp is felt, when it does not seem to 'equip' the 'educated' ones to handle life well...

Strangely enough,

this 'education'... was not 'isolated' from life itself... in the ancient days...
The 'structure' called a school today... was a little smaller in the ancient days, and not everybody was sent to it (Gurukulam)...

A look at the 'classes' (varna system)... seems to offer some clues...

One class used the 'intellect'.... more often..... to handle life (and obviously therefore, appreciated the interdependence with other classes better!).. the 'system' was incorporated (seamlessly interwoven) into the life-style prescribed to this class... (when intellect is 'addressed'... the activities prescribed, might transcend perception at logical/emotional levels... most 'rituals' seem to indicate this much!)...

The next class uses the 'mind' more often.... logic for material aspect of life... Emotions for maintaining the social harmony... Imbalance in basic-needs might upset the social harmony (emotional trust, the worst of susceptibilities)... The training thus involves an imparting, structured well enough, to suit the evolving social network... Concepts therefore needs to be transmitted with a little bit of 'practicability'... and yet, basic concepts ought to get handed down to generations, simultaneously+ parallelly too! The need to grasp the society's needs envisages a balanced emotional mind, to ensure an accurate grasp...

The next class uses the physiology more often... and in a very dexterous manner... The training is also therefore... more of physical nature ... they lean to handle their body well, and with a well-maintained physique, the emotions being capable of shifting very consciously (not oscillating too-loosely), between compassion and a sense of 'natural-justice' , dispensed judiciously... This class takes up the responsibility of administration, and defence...

The rest of the residual people happen to also constitute into a class, which keeps the 'training' aspect to its barest minimum... Even this class happens to transcend the animal level 'excellence' when we look at how the offsprings of animals happen to learn their way-to-livelihood all-by-themselves!

The classifications were never like a 'water-tight-compartment'... though the formal pronouncement of any upgradation rested with the intellectual class, while the down-grading was by almost a consensus, not waiting for the immediate availability of an intelligent/wise one in the vicinity!

Since the ancient 'classification' , has taken very ugly turns into political proportions in the present day, I had to heavily restrain a liberal use of those labels which makes a grasp quite easy!
But yes, I had to trim the 'observations' based on which I made this guess work, just because the readers do not manage the focus for too long! (Ironically, that... the observations.... constitute the most fascinating part of the analogy... it is too voluminous.... and unless a mind is really eager, the very exercise of reading/listening might become enervating... apart from the fatiguing to a mind!... Spiritual path, I find, leaves me with no options/choices about observing these traditional methods of imparting education, of which literacy was confined only on 'need-based-tutoring'... ).

Learningly yours,

psn (24th October, 2015)