life, as it happened

 I was reviewing my own desire, intensity and involvement in being useful to others around.

Professionally,  as a clerk....I gave my-best....regardless of rate of return in all forms.

As a person, a civilian, it was on situational-basis.... situation decides, how much I can contribute. Mostly it was physical labour, since a clerk can't grow rich😜

1992 became a significant turning point in my spiritual pursuit. I found that abstractions were getting crystallized and an opportunity seemed to arise, to be able to share my experience & mainly, the age-old time tested practices in a structured way. Thus "volunteering"  opened up as a major utilized of my time & energy resources... it peaked for about 8 years.

Situation pushed me out of the physical aspect of volunteering. 

Sharing my experience through writings, replaced the physicality of activity. This, I knew, wasn't going to "produce" much tangible results. But nature surprised me a few times😜.... "mere typed words"( as a seeker had put it) did some subtle magic 🙂....as if trying to spur my desire to express,.

1992...

I was literally "running" alongside a few health-conscious middle aged people who were doing "slow running" in circles along the outer edge of a large sports stadium.  They pause for breath. That's when I speak "sir, there is a program that can enhance the results of your running-for-health phenomenally 🙏... I invite you for the "free talk" of first day of the 13-day program.... if convinced, you can pay 250 for next 13 days! I speak from experience 🙏 "( my son, about 8 then, was eager to sprint alongside me, more out of curiosity to learn "how dad handles his life?" Kids learn from live-examples, not lectures 😜).

Now,

I am naturally getting dissuaded from all kinds of activities involving any kind of interference into the lives of others 😀... ( I think the tradition of forest-dwelling/vanaprastha, was a facilitator to promote this natural tendency. Since going to any forest isn't too practical today, I need a hard-way to replicate it! Confinement, in a subtle way. The diminishing attention span of present day minds supports me a lot, I remaining inconspicuous in the middle of a crowd😜

There is a price to pay, for substitutes and alternatives to "natural" choices🙏.... I am paying that price in deffered installments.

Life is beautiful ( Don corleone said in Mario-Puzo's story "Godfather" , just before he fell dead quietly!)

Just yours,

psn ( 5 may,  2024)