Experience is what it does to us, when we do with what happens to us

“Experience is not what happens to a man; it is what a man does with what happens to him.”... said " Aldous Huxley" !!!

I was quite impressed by this 'quote'...

so I tried a...

a crude translation ...

"मानव के साथ जो होता है 

वह अनुभव नहीं कहलाता 

बल्कि जो हुआ उस से क्या करता है "

why not in that 'tough' malayalam too!

മനുഷ്യൻ നേരിടുന്ന സംഭവങ്ങൾ അല്ല അനുഭവം 

 അവൻ ആ സംഭവങ്ങൾ കൊണ്ട് എന്തു  ചെയ്യുന്നു എന്നുള്ളതാണ് !

Very often, we find that a long forgotten 'happening' resurfaces within us as a 'deep experience' only when we 're-live' that event even long after it had really happened! (For instance, we 'understand' why our parents 'scolded us' so severely, only long after they have 'gone'... while we had barely managed with that 'surge-of-hate' that had overpowered us at that event itself, when it was 'live'!)...

This experience, if it is deep enough, tells us how to deal with an event in future...

Only a well-balanced-mind can manage to squeeze the 'most' out of even trifling incidents!

Those who happen to 'settle' down (really) into deep meditative states,

(just sitting quiet, doing nothing, eyes closed......)

or,

even those ... just watching one's own breath ...

among them... those who improve the very quality of watching their breath...

these two....

know too well... no incident is a trifle... every moment of life enriches us in many ways!

(To such people, who are prepared to look at 'happenings' thus.... shall we say, “welcome to spirituality” ?... For a very long time, I found myself trying-hard... to play that dual role... of a host saying 'welcome' ... as also that 'reluctant-guest', struggling to tell myself, “May I come in Sir?”... :)) }...

Experi-mentally yours,

psn (21st November, 2013)   

Silent Mode

That 'mobile' remains all the more noisy, but right within only... when we turn it on 'silent-mode'... it vibrates perhaps.. and if placed on a hard surface, it might even spoil its 'vibrant' nature (the temper that affords the vibration...)...

Very much like our minds....

(I wonder.. 'is it because of that internal vibration, suppressed by outer-situation, on our forced-silent-mode, that we succumb to stress-related-ailments! Dunno!)

We claim to be able to remain silent, for a while (calling it very fancifully as 'meditation' even, at times of course!)... But the internal turbulence is now even greater (and so the drop off rate, relatively, from that wonderful meditative-spiritual-practice!... Some of us who manage to sustain, are in for a bigger surprise... they become 'aware' of the non-verbal thought forms/processes... and this shakes off a lot more, when they try to hang-on holding the steel rods of that speeding bus of spirituality, and fall off soon!.... Only a few manage to stay on... and then, they need not hold-on... “it” holds them, on-and-on!)...

There was a joke! (Long ago, I read it in “Readers' Digest”... That 'Mom' narrated it in first-person!

She insisted to her son “I ask you ... this instant.. SIT down”

The kid,.... sat down, ... but added, “But inside me... I am still standing” (and the mom burst into a laughter!)...

(That was 'standing alone' on a 'silent-mode'!)...

The 'being' makes more noise perhaps... after we are into a 'grave-silence'... and therefore the 'ghost-voices/noises'... thereafter... but the same repetitious tunes only.. until a flexible form is re-acquired!

Silently yours,

psn(18th November, 2013)

I am retired, Don't tag me now!

I am retired, Don't 'Tag' me now!

The 'format' seemed to say...

The format of 'Create-blog' carries a 'default' tag... 'Sachin Tendulkar'....

And the cursor is allowed to 'escape' from that 'tag' box.... (until the 'default' nature of that tag is disabled...!)...

Or else... the tag sticks to anything else said in the name of 'blog'... as a tag of that pure-being-'Sachin'... (He is the 'available-pure' among us... so we need not try to find the available-small-impurities in him, to just find 'some-fault'...

I was looking at post '14 November 2013' blogs... all of them carry that 'Sachin-tag'!... (like our politicians who take the 'tag-credit' for everything good that happens even naturally in our land!)

The Tag...!

The tags we had.... tags along with us! (We carry a lot many of these tags!... The grand-mother is no more 'grand' when she tags around a child, replacing that 'live-mother'.... instead of complementing her functions... the 'mother' tag that remained unfulfilled when it was 'official' now seeks to fulfill it depriving a 'real-mother' to do it 'her-own-way'... and the kid 'announces'... “my daadi gave me the permission”... and the 'daddy' looks puzzled at the kid ! (The daddy-jee had communicated the 'don't allow that kid to tamper with it' only to the 'Mummy' ... the 'grand' in all its grandeur, mummified that mummy into a silence, silently too!)....

Somewhere it is the tags that we carry... that acts like a 'non-stick-tawa'... when we try to cook spirituality into us! (At the hands of a 'genuine' teacher, it pains a little right from day-1, when the teacher surgically removes those tags embedded in us).

(All I try to do is to keep a little distance from tags... and people now use a different tag, yet again... 'humble'... No! There is no humility at all, when we seek to be a bit effortless... it takes so much effort, to move into that 'effortlessness'... Tags!)...

Meanwhile, if possible, please click the 'x' sign on those blogs about which our dear Sachin is genuinely innocent(at speakingtree.in   ... He too is 'retired' now.. (like me!........ while the going was still 'good'... there is a saying ... 'stop singing while the humming still-sounds-good'... not when the voice is hoarse!).

Taggedly yours,

psn(18th November, 2013)

Migration

“Migration Certificate”....

That is how I got initiated into this concept of 'migration'...

It really did not afford a 'smooth' migration at all! Instead it was 'in essence' a certificate of “Good-riddance” from one set of Masters (yes, at school, they are the Masters of 'our universe'... some elder tried remind it when a lazy cousin of mine overslept, with the dialogue “Quick! Your Master has come, Get up!!!' and that kid scrambled up in the bed only to a 'wide-eyed' discovery that it was the cozy comforts of a home, and not that mid-day-mandatory nap at the school!)... This migration certificate just says that this idiot is good for nothing, and hence we have 'no-objection' to his going elsewhere to continue sleeping in the class-room! (There was even no questions raised, when I needlessly obtained a migration certificate after the graduation also! That certificate is encased inside such ignorant set-of-procedures!)...

Migratory birds, are cheerful perhaps, because they look at the places of dwelling only as 'shelters' (Gharonda), and not as 'homes', 'apart-ments' , or 'f-l-a-t's' (where some of the males are usually a 'sleeping-partner-only' in the family-business, with the women folk, kept busy after-and-before working hours too!... the males find it so tiresome to 'migrate' from one couch to the another, when the spouse requests, 'May I sweep the dust underneath this one... please...?)... But, when somebody teases me with a new found freedom that now he is 'as free as a bird', I retort saying, 'Ah! After all, those high-flying birds can only hop, once they are 'grounded'... they cannot keep flying for ever after all, while I can keep walking at will, all my life, to reach only a bit later to where they can fly apart!'...!!!

At work place, some of my colleagues carry their chair to the new table (rotation of duties), rendering themselves to 'migratory only along with their chair'... ! (They are a bit limp to one side of their shoulder, and the missing rubber shoe of that chair helps maintaining the balance, parallel to table-level, while working!)...

Yet some others simply migrate just their pay-scales, not their work-pattern, when they are automatically-promoted, much to the embarrassment of their new bosses, who find that 'junior-attitude' to be of no use or productivity at enhanced/widened set of responsibilities!

The bride migrates physically to the groom's house, but her 'thoughts' linger around the mother's home yet.... and the adjustment seems to take the whole of youth away, and the onslaughts of old-age to be too-late to migrate-now! (there is another candidate, the daughter-in-law with similar starting-troubles!)

The 'being' often forgets that it has migrated into this physical body, only with a work-Visa, and not a guest-type-visa alone, and is sent back too often to dissolve all the 'specific-work-visa's' acquired during the previous visits! It is much later that we get into 'earn-while-you-learn' mode! When the Visa manifests a 'vision' and we just-begin-to-enjoy... it is already too close to the 'expiry date of the visa and the passport as well!'....

So, better to learn the 'technicalities' of migration at subtle levels, loosening up even, if needed our physical comfort-zones, to afford us into meaning-full migration into any kind of migration! (As if to give an 'indicative reference' to this aspect, that grated-cocoanut, when migrates into a dish yields distinct kind of flavor, taste and fragrance even, depending upon how we crush, chip, roast, grate, grind or even squeeze its milk out.... and then add it to the dishes!.. But, like the cocoanut, we need to first break our head over it!)

Migrantly yours,

psn (7th November, 2013)

Changed Pattern!

Cheeni kitne leti ho chai mei?
(How much sugar do you take in your tea?)
Changed pattern!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AQR6cB1DXzY

.....

I was amused to find, this short documentary ends with the same "tea" item!

Storm in a tea-cup...   !

"Response" to a repetitious pattern of eve-teasing...   made the difference...

We need to respond thus to 'our-own-patterns'...  a bit boldly!  The internal-eve-teasing...   needs the 'purushaarth' in us to wake up and defend/protect the feminine grace in us! (call it  by any name...   in essence, it is spirituality!)

Dunno, how long this link will remain...   the video link!

psn (7th November, 2013)

Mind Game

I never imagined that our dear Speaking Tree forum would provide such amazing examples of mind game, to give an 'actual' but really 'virtual' demonstration of our mind-game on spiritual path!

How to click the "more" button, on that drop down menu of 'Notifications'?

This is exactly the type of experiences during a spiritual program...    We find the location of 'More' , to share, after the program, when we try to tell, how beautiful the 'inner experience' was!!!  We know, it is somewhere 'down' there inside us...  It does not just 'click'...   and the mind runs about like a 'mouse' trying to reach it...!

If a mouse cannot reach it, who else can?

That Hubby, who ran to hide under the cot, when his stout spouse came menacingly with that proverbial rolling pin, and asked, "Hey! Are you a man or a mouse? come out.."...  and he cheerfully replied, "I am the 'man of the house', and I can remain where ever I like to, in this house!"...   

psn (5th November, 2013)

(Dear Good Karma,  

Please find a way to pardon me....    really, I have no complaints at all with this 'inadvertent' bug... hopefully, it might be a freak instance due to contributory negligence of the operating system/ or the browser.. that I use...  But I was so excited with that rare occurence, that I was tempted to quote it as an example of 'unreachable layers of our mind!'...  Thanks!

http://www.speakingtree.in/public/spiritual-blogs/seekers/science-of-spirituality/mind-game-242564

Patterns and Us!

'Tea or coffee?'

I was asked, and I tried it thus (once, long ago...): Both!

And I could get to see a 'bewildered look' in the eyes of the host as well as others present! (What I chose, not to tell them was... I even tried mixing both, very privately and it tasted unique... I was not too sure, if it is good to do so often, and hence dropped the idea... not 'my-pattern'...)

....

It amused me often to look at people around as patterns, with the same basic human-design! While animals derive a pattern according to the situation, plants undergo modification at 'design' levels even retaining hard to retain the basic design (for instance, we are advised to 'try' that cucumber, which looks same, but some are bitter... and if we do not 'test-taste' the whole salad gets spoiled!)...

Men usually go for plain or 'checks', parallel lines etc for shirts, and even pants/trousers at times, while trying to keep the latter ones in dark shades usually... It is the patterns of ladies that calls for 'selection' when they decide upon going in for something 'new'... (I tried a shirt out of a beautiful design called something like 'forest-fire' from a 'saree-material' by a branded name, Garden Vareli .. I had a very tough time, to get the 'permission' from my bossing-spouse, to even buy that piece of cloth! The shirt looked great, and was liked by all the colleagues, not because of its pattern itself... more because I looked very comical in that shirt, and as long as they are not wearing such funny stuff, they do not mind appreciating or applauding it!.. Now it is lying beneath a large heap of old shirts, though not at all worn-out... There is a tension around the house, ... Yes, the moment I name that shirt, our home becomes a house... 'house of commons' like, and sparks are in the offing already! I am 'allowed' to wear it only when I go out to meet 'non-issue' kind of people, that too 'patlee-gali-sey' ... I still am a fan of that design... err... pattern!)...

In general, men are after 'logical-patterns' and women find appeal in 'non-logical' ones (what ever that means!)....

Army changes the pattern of thinking of a fresh recruit, only then he becomes a soldier ....

A bride struggles to fit into the life-pattern of the new house-hold, that she seeks to 'become-one-with'...

The work-pattern of an organisation doesn't 'feel' comfortable, for a fresher, and he is confused, into trying to find out 'what went wrong with my choice of office?' (That is, if he is already not into that blame-game-pattern of thinking as to 'who is to be blamed?'....)

Coffee after dinner is a craving due to acquired craving-pattern of the physical body... (The 'asking' for 'quality-decoction-coffee' and its different 'standards' varies according to the 'craving-pattern', when we look at the two instances: First coffee after brushing of teeth, and last coffee after dinner!).

A kid is consciously en-grooved into a pattern of induced-sleep, by a mom, when she places a specific thing/object like some towel, particular-doll/cloth, and only then the kid sleeps soon... this pattern comes handy to 'boast' that 'only I can make that kid sleep without fuss, and in a very brief time'!)... Somebody makes a 'chance-discovery' of a better pattern, which the kid takes an 'instant' liking for, and the mom is disturbed out of her own mind-pattern, and only manages a 'grim-face'.. not knowing how to 'explain' this pattern-spoil that happened all of a sudden!...

Music-pattern of certain experts finds an instant-liking with the masses, and we find people claiming, “I hear 'a broken piece of tune' and I know at once, it is Naushad Saheb”... signature-pattern!.. Anger pattern, emotion-pattern, waking-pattern... the list is endless!

Spirituality seeks to take our 'being' out of this pattern-web, and then afford us to enjoy all the patterns, choicelessly! (Meanwhile, there are sets of 'life-positive' patterns, and life-negative patterns... and the situation decides better, which of the choices makes our life to crawl, or glide smoothly!)

Patternedly yours,

psn (3rd November, 2013)

Heavy Mind-set!

The caged Lion in that zoo is a 'picnic' spot for me! That was what I thought ... only till I reached an age where I had to walk right through that zoo to even reach my school every day! (The walk-route was a bit shorter than bus route, and bus route costed bus-ticket, which we couldn't really afford then!)...

The lion grew lean as days passed by... visitors even 'sympathised' that it is ill fed...

It had no 'walking' space... all it did was turn around after a couple of steps (the cage was small!)...

No exercise possible...

After a couple of decades, I found people spending money to 'become-lean'!!! (I did not really dare to quote that deep-embedded memory of that lion who grew lean doing nothing, spending even less on food!)....

Our mindset is perhaps inclined towards anything that makes us heavy... and so the 'heavy-mind-set'.. or 'heavily set mind of ours'... We like to have both, the things that make us heavy, and also to remain lean... Now there is a 'commercially viable' scope for those who can sell the 'make-belief' ideas!

In response to my previous blog (sharing an experience), I was asked specific queries about what I did when I lost nearly 4 kilos, in just about a month... I tried to reply very honestly, though I knew, my answers do not match those famous 'weight-reduction-programs' which carry a heavy price-tag... It was then, I thought, why not remind myself of that lion, who is about 600 pounds ( a guess, from what I heard from a world famous hunter who said about the choice of death.. “I would prefer to die at the hands of a tiger pouncing upon me, with its 700 pounds of weight, which would instantly crush my bones, than an electric chair which is supposed to be the most 'humane' death-sentence-infliction by legal authorities).. That lion does not do any 'exercise' in that small cage. Today, the zoos try to provide 'natural-habitat', and what I got to see was during 1950's, when animals were given little attention in captivity!

We have to see what kind of food this body is designed for... What kind of physical activity this body is designed for... what kind of ambiance this body is designed for (fan, A/C,  apart-ments, etc is what we have... I heard a news-report that somewhere in west, in a very cold country, there was forced-power-shortage due to fuel costs, and people 're-discovered' a healthy way to live, when they willingly allowed the cold-climate to seep in within their homes too, avoiding fuel-power-heated-airconditioning!)... And in India, air-conditioning even today means, make it too severely cold inside, use thick blankets, pollute the entire city outside of homes, and boast about 'having' tonnes of 'costly A/c' (weight reduction programs are already 'within-reach' through internet!)...

A person very close to me, past 60, visited a cousin of his, and having nothing else to do (after that 'hello, how are you' etc..), tried their 'gadget' of walking at the same place, on that machine, and then cycling at the same place... he started sweating profusely... 'good' he must have thought... but the sudden flow of blood caused a heavy stress on the heart, and within a few days, he needed cardiac-related-medical assistance! The body is a wonderful machine with adequate safety-checks in place... when we are engaged in hectic physical activity involving legs, our breath becomes heavy and fast... only then, the sweating starts, as a second level warning.. when the activity is with only the hands, then that panting is very mild, and sweating becomes almost simultaneous... but not suddenly profuse... it is a kind of warning, not to go too hard and hectic on that activity!

What is amazing is, what we call as 'stamina' is delayed panting (rapid breathing), and not the ability to breath faster and yet remain normal! The 'stamina' is never at the cost of early warning signs, the safety-checks! (During school days, I practised slow running when compelled by a 'national-coach', I discovered that I could reduce the breath-rate to near normal and still keep running slowly, thus shifting that 'stamina' increase towards leg's muscular strength, instead of remaining stuck at lung-limitation! That is what exactly drew the attention of that coach to call me and teach me 'track-technique', for free!... He was impressed that my breath did not decide my stamina-limitation!).

I perhaps failed to provide 'healthy-tips' for weight reduction... I wonder what that lion would have done, if pizza, noodles, samosa-kachori, and such costly fast-foods of our style were fed to it forcibly instead of just the raw meat which was meat for its body-design! And then, provide an A/c glass cabin(rain/sun protected), cushioned sofa, a TV, and a drum of Coca-cola, and see if it would say 'Yeh dil maange more!'

Heavily yours,

psn (1st November, 2013)

Sharing an Experience!

The best use of 'means of communication' perhaps, is in sharing an inner experience! It at once 'speaks' about the very perception levels of that individual!... The details of the outside situation which might necessitate the 'cohesive-binding' (like that maida-flour, crushed bread-crumbs of outer lining of a bread, or the rusk-powder... used to bind together the potato-cutlet, ... only then it roasts well on a tawa, the iron pan, and absorbs good amount of oil meaningfully, to give us the unique combination of crispiness at the outside, and the soft-tasty-inside together!... and yes, the sauce, if it is also 'khatta-meetha'... then 'yeh dil maange more' of it!)... that cohesive binding is what the trivial details of outside situation should ideally do, and should not 'take away' too much of the attention!

I am just-fresh... out of an amazing experience! I got 'entangled' into volunteering yet again, at this wrong age (60+), and the two others were very close people to me, who gladly agreed to 'try-out' , for a 'let-us-see-what-happens' kind of experiment...

What we did was on a 20-hours per day basis. (With me around, the waking time is more or less fixed, but not the 'getting-into-bed' hour!).

I was in for a unique experience! Just two others, and myself-the-experiment-steerer, .... We experimented with natural herbs at 4.30 am or so... followed by hectic physical acrobatics (to the extent that the body affords at this age!)... the body limitations were sought to be countered with deeper-states of infused relaxations! It worked wonderfully well! Only that the demonstration of a few 'gimmicks' triggered a heavy dose of 'edema' in me, and it caused a little discomfort and lots of pain-sensation , when I inadvertently 'got-lost' into the memory of what I used to do 2 decades ago, and pushed my body into such frenzy styles all-at-once, without even warming it up first! Yes, the pain subsided no sooner than when I inwardly 'apologised' to my nerves, and the build-up of fluids around waist decided to leave that place in a matter of few hours... this itself is a surprising 'response' from my dear-vehicle, the dear body of mine... which is able to be-friend me after quite a long spell of stoic-inactivity!

I found myself able to delve quite deep into the subtle traits of the two others, who had long-ago cast away their basic traits, which was so easily visible during childhood, but now camouflaged with 'masks' that the situation keeps piling on their 'persona' over the years! ( I suppose, eminent psychiatrists are usually grappled with this very task of 'reaching' into the deeper levels of minds of their patients, while attempting to afford a longer-duration-relief. And only then can the 'just-on-surface' symptoms be shaken up, shedded, and stoved away ... at least temporarily!.. A very very similar pattern to those 'very-intense-spiritual' practices of ancient days, where the Masters enable the disciples to 'do-it-yourselves' using tailor-made tools, ... of-course, at a proximity!)...

Their part of sharing of inner-experience is yet to come to me... it is only a matter of choice, purely theirs! But, I had such a wonderful experience, which opened up yet a few more doors and windows, to reveal very unique tools, that I am hardly able to contain the joy! Please see, even for people to 'stay' with cousins, friends, etc for a month long ... these days.. is an 'out-dated' concept! My entire child hood was at least one-and-a-half month stay with cousins/relatives at far away places, and the school's summer holidays provided very good provision for such experience (that left the 'tourist-attraction-places' to be visited as a 'later-on' choice, when I am able to stand on my-own-two-feet firmly... my dad found the 'economics' to be more viable to just keep on visiting the ancestral places of his , and the brother's of his spouse, to deposit the trouble-some kids for a while, and then to breathe freely for a few days!).. Now, it is just 2 or 3 days 'max'!

The basic traits surface when the mind is relatively distanced from a 'routine' and also relaxed, is what I got to notice... this at once brings in another problem... that of very frequent and quite-needless reference to past 'stories'... for which, the simple solution was to visit yet another set of past stories, push into it a few 'masalaa's' (fresh spices), make it animated, lively, and keep pouring it incessantly (my poor throat took the entire brunt of such hectic activity, and it turned hoarse in a very little while... but it got to understand that I am in no mood to descend into silence for a while even, and it churned out noises of all sorts!... much to the amusement of a listener!).... The only 'indicative' response was a 'wish' that we had a 'recording' device (a cam-recorder or so), to capture the eccentricities which were so amusing!

The whole exercise was not entirely without rewards... They found their physique to be still capable of responding amazingly... way beyond what the medicines and pills are 'expected' or 'supposed' to do by way of relief!... The spirit did soar a little above 'ground-levels', from the visible cheer all-through!... The gross physical weight got reduced by 2+ kilograms (I lost 4, in the bargain!... I also lost a little bit of 'hope' to become eligible for 'sensible' food, which I also happen to like very much, relish very much... when the first ever lipid-profile-test of my life revealed a couple of days ago, that I am a miserable 'normal' idiot, and it is quite 'okay' to use my stomach as a garbage can of all the junk-foods that our kitchen is going to churn out in the name of 'celebrating the in-coming 'diwalaa'... oops... diwaleee , sometime next week!)

Thus, yours,

psn ( 30th october, 2013)

Drawing Attention

“I like to 'draw' your 'kind' attention....” is the most familiar form of its use....

A 'cat-walk' seeks to draw 'special' attention! ('Head-over-heels' is no less a competitor to 'high-heels' when it comes to drawing attention!)

'Contrast-matching' works at both levels, trying to 'draw' attention towards the match-maker, as well as the ironical contradiction it (other-wise)implies!

Breath-watching, as a spiritual technique, seeks to 'draw' attention towards the 'life' happening within, at yet deeper levels!

Ambiguity is what deters attention usually... And therefore, 'to draw' the attention!

It at once implies the possibility of a 'disambiguation' (due to a possible lack of attention,.... 'attention-deficit', like our dear 'trust-deficit'!), that is very likely, in the situation contemplated of, while trying to familiarize the other person, with some abstract idea, concept, or even just the visuals of something that needs strong focus, for lack of direct sensory perception!

Spiritual concepts are highly elusive... (like, when so many people very casually claim, that they 'do Yoga r-e-g-u-l-a-r-l-y'... they just mean those postures which are expected to keep their physicality a little bit 'in-shape', while the goal has nothing to do whatsoever about 'attentiveness'!.. Attentiveness, if at all it gets enhanced, is an inadvertent consequence, though beneficial!... Even the acquisition leaves no trace of its entry! The prime goal is to 'get-attention', and subordinate goal to keep fit.. that is all!)

Then, how did the ancient Masters manage to 'draw' attention of the 'readers' of what they left off, in just a few words? (I used to wonder)! I recall our family visit to the famous Konarak Temple, where, we landed on a 'listless' day... The 'guides' outnumbered the visitors, who were even 'locals' on that fateful day (meaning, only foreigners are looked at as 'visitors'... Indians are looked 'down' upon by those guides, maybe for the simple reason that we convert value addition, to our local rupees, where as phoren-visitors are busy converting their own currencies into rupees, leaving their own 'look-out' for value addition to 'a matter of chance'!... Very clearly, they know, they cannot 'expect' much out of 'left overs' of such a rich heritage that India was once!)... The 'nagging' even, therefore by those guides was 'extra-irritable' in their tone itself... I had to now 'draw' their attention to a 'possibility' that some idiots like me can perhaps do without a guide to get myself, or my attention drawn, towards the ancient monument, and what it was supposed to convey... I did this, after a brief 'organising' (like in that movie Pakeeza where the hero Rajkumar says to the heroine, 'Please wait aside for a while, while I 'present-my-credentials' to this fellow'.. .. the 'fellow' had just beckoned a 'random-wandering-boy' nearby, to tell the hero 'who he was', just to impress the hero that the 'fellow' was no small-fellow, but a local 'dada' whom the whole place knew, and therefore the 'any-wandering-boy' was good enough to present his own 'debentials' (please look at this word 'debentials' as opposite of 'credentials... debit-credit-concept!)...

I asked the guide, 'Sir, do we not see, even a stupid toothpaste is given a disproportionate magnitude of wide, long, broad, tall publicity, just to ensure that people do not 'miss' their(own) attention? And do you think, those who constructed such a huge temple, would not have thought of 'drawing' attention of visitors to its beauty, its intricacies, its symbolisms, etc, and merely depend on the uncertainties of future guides?'... He was not to be put off... I then pointed a few aspects of 'on-line' features that were ingrained into those base-structures of that giant wheel's peripherals nearby, as a sample, which I happened to notice... He admitted his ignorance. I then softened his dejection by suggesting that he now updates the trainers at a future 'refresher-course' for those guides, and allow the 'department' (archaeology/tourism), to decide its worth for themselves!

I must add a 'true' incident... A desi techie (computer-science), happened to land at phoren University to pursue MS in that very subject... By chance, he knew how to revamp the internal email system, to 'customize' it or make it 'tailored' to suit the administrators... The boss liked the design, the format, etc, and asked that kid to 'present' it to an august audience (some directors, vice-presidents, and the likes)... He was given the gadgets of 'audio-visuals' to assist the presentation. That too found a great appreciation of the boss.. The boss now asked, 'Do you have a suit?'.. Dumbfounded, the kid said, 'No sir, I just go about in T-shirt, and Jeans', explaining the humble background of the banker-provided-by-nature, that funded his 'higher' education... The boss did feel a little sympathy, but voiced an embarrassment, 'But, it may look odd, when the whole audience is in formal dress, suit, tie, etc, and you like a street-urchin!'.. The kid took courage seeing the glimpse/trace of sympathy, and reassured, 'Sir, my humble dress will matter only for the first two minutes!' and waited. It did take 2 minutes for that 'boss' to grasp the implication of those words, and then he nodded... The presentation got an applause, and even a 'gesture' when 'funding' for 6 months came from that boss, who was not 'exactly' the usual fund-manager to dole out grants to a student 'directly'!

Two aspects, can affect attention-drawing... The perception, its ability, and also the 'presentation'...

Here on our spiritual forum, both have to get due 'attention', drawn from the very same 're-sources' within!

(Some time ago, I had tried to draw your 'kind-attention' towards the 'perception'--Inattentional blindness-- factor through two earlier blogs, 'Attentiveness' and 'Attentiveness, Alertness, Acceptance and Awareness'... sans-recourse, of course!).

Strangely enough, even computer experts recognise this 'attention-risk-factor' when they devised this: “Ctrl+Alt+Del for Windows NT-based systems (called Secure Attention Sequence)... and..... secure attention key (SAK) ”
So, lest we too become a 'ctrl+Alt+Del' (needlessly-too-often)...in the hands of Maya-Madam!

Drawn-and-yours,

psn(29th September, 2013)

The Fox who lost his tail!

It was in our school lesson... (Must be 'Aesop's fables')..

I have to be very brief with the story (it is too famous, already)...

A fox lost its tail, when it tried to come out of a trap... It saw its own reflection on the still surface of a pool of water and felt ashamed... It cannot appear before other foxes, in an 'as is where is basis'... It called for a Annual General Meeting of all the 'tail-holders' among foxes (like the share-holder's/stake-holder's meeting we have...).. It explained that this tail is a useless burden to carry, especially in the present day 'race' where we have to run away fast from all problems of life, and our speed is not even enough, when problems even overtake us, and wait ahead to pounce on us all-at-a-time, etc... Dump the tail... you will feel free... 'see I have a personal experience too!'

It appealed to young ones who constituted the 'majority-stake-holders' (the tail is that 'stake'!)...

Some where from a corner, an old fox, chose that appropriate pause in the speech, and said, 'Hey, that is because you already lost your tail!... come out and show your true colors, your inner peace-of-mind, after having lost the tail, and let people decide!' And then the other foxes got the message... The resolution failed.. AGM over... Tails saved... Tale served even!

But the foxes are 'original' in their cunningness!

We are only trying to 'copy-paste' their cunningness!... It works, but not for too long!

I saw a few elders around me even at home, criticising 'traditional' rituals as 'out-dated', useless, waste of time, meaningless, blind-faith, false-sentiment etc... And yet, almost a few among them, insisting that I follow some of the 'family-rituals', like mumble a prayer before that photo of the God, but only after lighting the oil-lamp (God-ji is electric-bulb-blind... like we are 'color blind' ... even rich people who could afford those colorful 'series-bulb-decoration' did not do-away with oil lamp!).... Temples in Kerala prohibit electric bulb inside sanctum, but it is okay outside it... Those were childhood memories...

Those who criticised, usually happened to be from 'that lot' who really never tried to experiment with these rituals rigorously (it was a part-time affair for them like some hobby, when there is nothing better to do, try out these rituals.. as a precautionary measure to create a 'case-history')...

That spouse of my neighbourhood uncle... brilliantly justified, “What to do?.. cost of living is spiraling so high! Tomatoes is now 2 annas per seer, last week it was just one and a half anna!.. I personally do not approve my husband accepting bribe, and I have 'very clearly' told him so... Our scriptures have said, we have to one day pay for our sins! But, when somebody 'voluntarily gives a little money, how could he say no?.. And, having accepted that money, how can he delay the 'giver's papers'? ... We have the spiraling cost of living, and we have to save something for kids, education, marriage, etc' ... The next door lady just listens... No harm in 'just-listening'! (The bribe-taker has lost his tail... he is creating a majority!... Very soon, bribe can even be legalised!).

...

As I grew up... I felt, something is not okay with those who complain about our own culture... There are too many contradictions! How did these scriptures stand the test of time? Is it possible that the whole population was totally stupid for 5000 years? Then what happened to that proverb, 'All men cannot be fooled for all the time'? And yet, nothing was tangible like those school's chemistry lab experiment... 'blue litmus turns red'! Even small thing which looked like miracles seemed within the range of explanation! That paper placed on a tumbler full of water, carefully inverted, and the hand gently removed, the water does not fall (the physics teacher did not even sound excited while 'explaining' this miracle!.... My excitement seemed stupid, when the 'learned' teacher delivered this lesson, so casually like the bus-conductor issuing proper ticket, not even looking at the face of the passenger!)

It was then, I decided, best way is to find out for myself, if these ancient rituals, practices, traditions, and scriptures were worth it, or were bogus!

None of these rituals yielded any 'tangible' experience... clipping the nose, mumbling some chant brought no chemical or physical change, between before and after!

The 'nature of declarations' of the scriptures did not seek any kind of patronage, sponsorship, acceptance, adherence or following... they simply declared it in the tone, as we would say 'Sun rises in the East'!.. If the interpretation of its meaning is 'blind' then we are in deep trouble, in finding out which is east, when we are 3 lakhs miles away from earth, and the Sun is still visible clearly!... It may not 'rise' at all, forget 'east'... It has to 'set' first of all, in order to 'rise'! And most of the things that they 'declared' are not easy to understand, feel, see or perceive!

I wished, if only that 'fox story was the other way'! (right now the bulk of present day crowd is already the other way! They have dumped not just one, several of their tails!.. and they are busy, persuading other foxes.. Somebody's girl ran away on the eve of wedding, and now they 'approve' freedom to run away (not using exact words, 'to run away'... but in a polished, diplomatic way, ... even a girl must have freedom to do what they like!.. True! When everybody, right from politicians who play with scams, adults who give and accept bribe, the passers-by ignore an accident victim, the police play the other-role often, why not this girl or boy, do what-they-like? All have the freedom to get their tails removed-for-good!)... During August, 1970 , I had a wonderful experience... the Higher secondary exams got delayed due to 'Telangana-Agitation' and the atmosphere was 'charged'... Mass copying was 'unofficially-official' and allowed... the invigilator's life was more precious than implementing 'no-copying allowed' so strictly! Everybody in that hall where I wrote, cheerfully got their tails cut off... I was the only idiot who did not feel like doing it... And, the only way that poor invigilator found, to very-safely appreciate me was, by bringing the 'extra' answer sheets, and the small piece of thread ('tag' they call it, used to tie up the loose answer sheets), right up to my seat, and perhaps praying silently that nobody notices it.. I too, would not have noticed (the heat was double in my head, trying to compete with a handicap!), had he not brought it unasked, by just noticing that I reached the last line of the paper (anyway, he had nothing better to do, since 'invigilation' now amounted to only claiming an amount stipulated for the day's work!)... I could not convince or explain my close friends with any 'good' reason for my stupidity! (And, at that age, I lacked the courage to spell out my hidden agenda! Spiritual seeking did not need any qualification... just two-times-meals.. for which, at least in those days, a +2 pass was not so essential!)... The small marks did surprise me, it was far more than I expected, because, there was a rumour that evaluation was going to be tough! Now, when I look back, Maya-Madam must have given me 'secret-marks' for my stupid-honesty too!

I could see it clearly... Spirituality is a personal affair, no point in looking at other's tail, whether it is missing or not! Strangely enough... I now seem to be able to 'guess' why those ancient masters just 'declared' and left it! What they said, the contents, the worth of it, does not seem to anyway depend on anybody to sustain!... We can just 'be-with-it'.. we cannot 'depend' on it even, the way we depend on our 'bank-balance' to just 'show-off' and impress an onlooker!.. That 'be with it' is at very deep level! The medical science is unable to define death, beyond 'clinical-death'! Maybe, it has not yet understood 'life' properly!... Good enough reason for me to go within and find out for myself!... (Here I must say, I found the 'genuine' researchers in the scientific-community, slightly better than 'aam aadmi', maybe out of sheer practical experience of years, when they are able to effortlessly curb their 'tendency' to 'justify' their theory in a great hurry!... They have been a great source of inspiration for me, when I read their personal life in renowned magazines like Readers' Digest, etc, where they are 'open-minded' on an on going basis... and not in a hurry to suggest to others to chop of their tails too!)

Somewhere, there was a very strong-structure in place!... Embedded systems... when the intensity of search got heated up sufficiently, the hidden switches got lighted up, and it illuminate a little bit, showing a small path through that dark tunnel, where hither to it looked only like a dead end, in that pitch dark!... Now, it is fun, watching both the sides, 'like that cat on a wall', but with slight difference... ensure that we fall only on to the other side, not this side again, whether it is by accident, we slip, we get pushed, we fall, or even the wall collapses! While on the wall, it is easier to look and be seen too, for yet others who like to 'hear' about what is on the other side.. and then it is for them to take it or leave it... the other side of it was never dependent on 'opposition's outside-support'!!!

psn (24th Sept, 2013)

Confusing Trust!

I am so sorry!

The title itself... or.. 'Even the title'.... suggests, that what follows is likely to be untrustworthy!

So, let us just have a 'relaxed' look at it... Let us decide to just entertain ourselves, taking care, not to get stuck too much into it, such that it does not confuse us at all!

So, does it now seem, this time, that my disclaimer, my suggestion, looks like : We can trust the 'confusion-about-trust?'... (some of us are so sure, by now, they would agree, thus: “I fully trust, that there is bound to be a confusion now, in the offing!”... Hey, to get rid of confusions, out of our life, which way is it going to work?.. Avoiding confusions? Or getting rid of confusions? But how?.. meeting the very source of 'our-confusions', up rooting it for good, once for all... etc! Not running away from 'talk-about-confusions'... but meeting it head-on, tenaciously!)

When ever somebody says, 'Trust me'... is it not going to 'firstly' cause a mild confusion... only when... the doubts-created-by-such-confusion, does not find a 'reasonable answer'... suspicion creeps in!

The lady of the house decides to drive a car... (it is almost a fashion in the west, not to 'trust-her-driving-pattern'... at least the several jokes we get to hear, seem to suggest.. statistically, it may not be too scary.... Hey, why am I substantiating such a mild statement? It is about confusions-of-trust, not about trustworthy-trust!)

The King loved the monkey, and (therefore, perhaps) the king trusted the monkey... The King was fast asleep... a fly landed on King's nose... the King stirred... the monkey noticed it... The monkey decided, to 'guard' the sleeping-king, from fly-menace (it did not find any scope to even 'consider a possible-monkey-menace').. it tried to ward off that fly... the fly persisted, shifting just the landing ground (neck, chest, arms, nose, forehead, etc of that king!)... Anger crept into the monkey (but the source of anger was... 'Love for king' so says the story... but from monkey's perception, it may just be a 'sense-of-loyalty' at best, or at worst... 'insurance-policy' for the bananas provided by the king, when it has 'noticed' the King ordering “Mere bandar ke liye, Best-tasty, fresh, latest banana lao!' )...

the fly by now, was not just a 'fly-by-night' affair... it has come to stay, flying (like FDI in aviation!).. the monkey got 'wild' by now! (wild is its 'home' any way!... and when it is 'at home' of its own, trust shifts into its own 'home-grown-traits'!)... It picked up the sword, and aimed at the fly, now sitting near the neck... Swishhh! The fly escaped, and the King now 'slept-off' for good!

So, some antidotes that are likely to be effective ... (use logic... what else can we hope to have!)

List it out:

1)Integrity trust (not, accuracy-trust-- count the cash even from a trusted-cashier)

2)Garbage trust (computers, maintain very high level of integrity, when we consciously maintain awareness that it is 'virtual-garbage'... looking thus, we are warned of sleeping virus, latent bugs, memory-location-fallibility, data-packet-erosion, ... why, even the .... sleep-quota-deficiency of 'system-Admin-Sir'

3)Accuracy trust ('Bait-money'... offered by police, crime-investigators, Anti-bribe squad etc... they make no mistake, listing out every bit of details so well, that even the victims manage to guess, “hey! This looks too good to be real enough to quietly loot!”)

4)Inaccuracy trust (Some people are famous to do it only the 'other way'.. so tell them the opposite of what is needed by them... I don't know, here I am confused, whether to call it opposite-trust or negative-trust!)

5)Time trust (time takes care of all problems! We even mistrust those bhoot-bangla... but never heard of a 2500 year old ghost!.. these ghostly people re-surface, waiting only up to say 4 generations, 'max'... Maybe the ghostly-aspects might wear off, or rot, by then!... does it mean, even ghosts are time-bound?... I am confused... Some ghosts maintain punctuality about appearance, but their 'shelf-life'? Use-up before 4 generations? Maybe, other ghosts 'eat-them-up'.. scrambled/boiled!

6)Atheist trust-- This is a very controversial kind of trust... Can we trust an atheist?... 'Hey, atheism itself is about 'mistrust'... or its negative-varieties... sorry, positive varieties (negative for trust.. not mistrust.. minus-into-minus is plus, in maths, but trust?(dunno!)...

7)Dowry trust -- (better divide trust into installments! Sorry, the 'trust-money'... lest it ends up as 'ali-mony'!)

8)Blog trust --- Take a few 'too-good-to-be-original' sentences, the key words, and 'google' it... Not a very good 'insurance', if a person is good at 'goofing up the text-words' without mutilating the meaning... but... hey!.. that means (does it not?), that he is damn good at the concept, and has grasped it... trust his brains, not the intention to get a prize, somehow!

9)Perception trust--- No way to even trust it, till we have a few notches up, ourselves, into that perception! (otherwise, it is just monkey-business!)

10)Blind trust-- babies 'seem' to trust us blindly!... Infatuated-emotions seek to trust blindly (fake-lovers are the beneficiaries).. Computer-illiterate feel better to trust the fallibility of an emotion-less machine, rather than the motionless-bureaucrat, hence e-governance!

11)Sentiment/Superstition trust --- (eleven is an auspicious number.. no other reason for me to reach only this far!)... Trust-not-me... but beware of my superstitious nature, when that takes over, I am worse than a maniac! (we hear about psycho-killers, whose pattern is to be trusted first, in order to 'guess' that next likely victim, and then to nab.... we have 'shifting-superstitions' with gadgets getting outdated too fast!)...

If the list doesn't seem to grow, then something else is growing within us, subtly, clandestinely... let us call it 'unconditional-trust'!

Unconditionally-conditioned,

yours,

psn(22nd September, 2013)

Converging Conversation!

Convergence can be very fruitful, even if we are going to be very careful, to avoid a conversion!

A blog is a conversation, and so also are the responses to it, whether in the form of replies, or its other variations...

Now, conversation, by itself, or when looked at in isolation, presents unique and distinct possibilities...

For instance this link presents about 56 variations.... ( http://www.thefreedictionary.com/conversation )

The entire text would be cumbersome to read here... but a few samples might make it tempting enough to lead a person to look-for-more of it!

Quote:

Conversation

1. Conversation … was like trying to communicate with a ship sinking in mid-Atlantic when you’re on shore —William Mcllvanney
   47. Talking to him was like playing upon an exquisite violin. He answered to every touch and thrill of the bow —Oscar Wilde

50. Talking to you is like sending out your laundry, you don’t know what the hell is coming back —Neil Simon

Unquote:

The word 'converse' also connotes exchange of ideas, while its other meaning indicates a complete 'reversal' , as its concept... (http://www.thefreedictionary.com/converse)

“Conversion”.... involves a change, a shift (of some essential form or nature)....

Convergence is just about reaching a point where we 'meet' to agree or disagree even, with a sense of clarity!

It is this clarity, that goes to serve the purpose of a conversation, and keeps option all its options of future conversations!

So, if we are “aware' that our efforts are going to be to arrive at some kind of convergence (irrespective of whether such a convergence happens in one instance or not...!), each such effort does enhance our “ability to converge”..!!! Now please see, is not that convergence, in a very deep sense, in a directional-sense too, towards a 'spiritual-goal'?... We converge into our spirit, taking along, the things that help us, leaving aside the things that deter us, and therefore the very effort towards “a convergence” evolves itself into a wonderful tool! This can happen, at least at the mind-level, initially, and when the mind calms down a little, it can happen at our spirit-levels too!

Those who might feel fatigued a little-too-soon, seeming to be... 'reaching-nowhere'.. or even 'going-towards-nowhere' , might find this concept ........ about 'conversing, converse, conversion and then the elaborate possibilities through conversation, ...... worth looking into a bit deeper! Who knows, we might grow and evolve, in spite of others too!

Even conversely,

yours,

psn (17th September, 2013)

Being Practical!

“You will now have 'Practicals' this year!”

It was the teacher's clarity voice, giving the clarion call! (Chemistry teacher)...

Now, we were already 'practical' to some extent, so we knew, ... it means 'eshtra-note-book' (that is how quite a number of my class mates used to address the 'extra'... Very reasonable, since the word itself indicates, it is something 'extra' for them, so yet again 'being practical'..

We marched into the Lab... test tube breakages will be charged 10 paise... (but the lab assistant decided, anyway these kid are 'going to break it' so he announced, 'everybody cough up 10 paise per head next time you entarr here!

The spatula is never properly cleaned.. the chemicals are corrupt... results do not match theory! Early lessons in... effects of 'corruption'...! The teacharr says, 'never mind, write the practical note books, with a rough calculation, of 'what would have been the practical results'!

....

“Be practical Dad!” said a kid to his grey-haired dad, in the crowded train! (There was an arguement about when the train is likely to reach the destination, day-after-tomorrow!)... I was curious to know, as to how that 'Dad' ji is going to be now 'practical' about a 'theoretical-arguement'!

“He is a very practical man”... said a spouse... and clarified, “'he never argues unnecessarily”.. So, in this case... I concluded... being practical begins and ends with the non-argumentative-characteristic of the spouse-Madam!

....

And then I could see....

Merely being 'practical' may not give quality results (It is not usually the fisher folks who reach the swimming events in Olympics... theory is a must!.. And theory-based-training too!)

Mere theory did not also work (All new recruits who were 'just-marks-based' were 'practically' christened as 'You-are-being-impossible'... by the boss! (what better judgement can there be about it!)...

...

The 'practicals' with spirituality is too subtle... beyond physicality... (I was going to learn this a bit late, after years of slogging, with 'practice-practicals'... !!!)...

And then, the theory of spirituality should never be neglected.... here too 'Olympics-quality' or its just-nothing... (not yet 'nothingness')!!!

...

I am being very very practical now... at least here... Theory should be brief... (this blog, is by no measure, 'a practicals' !)...

Am I not...?

Practically yours,

psn (15th September, 2013)

Confusing Addictions!

Please!

It is not about 'confusion' at all....

It is about addictions...

And only then, about the confusion too, that we try to 'get-addicted' to!

Getting into groove.. is a sacred concept, when we allow it to retain its sanctity...

Once we get engrooved, if we seek to 'sleep' on the upper berth, drawing comfort from the 'thought' that this 'groovy-train' is going to take us 'all-by-itself' to our destination... no matter even if we sleep beyond 'our satation' (station)... then we get stationed into yet another addiction! Nothing more!

I read 'good-spiritual-blogs'... d-a-i-l-y... (“I got into the right groove”... now it is the job of those stupid blogs to do something... I cannot be bogged down into 'maintaining-awareness' about it.. that is the 'stand' taken while deciding to sleep on the upper berth of the spiritual train... 'good-masters' is that upper-cozy-berth! Now, even that TTE is a dis-turbance... 'turbulance-like'! Only until he perhaps announces, 'saab aap galat tarrain mei chad gaye ho!' Wrong train? “Oh! I forgot, both the trains meet at either side of this stupid plaform at this station... at the same time!... train is right... only the direction is wrong... No problem! Next birth.. err... next berth... oh! Kan-fused!”

I can only wish... but no stature to ask... Mr.Krishna tried his best to first announce in the preamble of each chapter, or at least at its end.. what it was supposed to 'contain'... People expected each verse to 'convey' (while the verse can only contain)... the truth!

(How can I find fault?... Already it is 18 chapters long... listening to a lecture so long, just standing, donning that 'heavy-metallic-armour' is no joke!... If He were to convey what it contains, it might easily require 18 lakh-crores of 'something' (See, I am even addicted to talking in terms of 'scam-scores'... lakh crores... not just 'karod', corrodes... etc..!... Companies need to run! Big stake... so no chances.. 'explanatory notes are going to 'convey'... what the legal text is 'only allowed to contain' in its 'Notice for AGM'.... not really practical on a war-field, with a Gita-text!... Recently, I saw and even 'felt' the pain! It was the momentous-moment!... The bride awaits... the groom just 'waits'... the priest has to lead the chants... the groom will just manage to groom-past what he manages to hear..(like we run the comb to groom the hair)... and the tie the knot! But 'addiction' took over! This priest-ji had recently decided to get 'en-grooved' into restoring the past glory of Hindu culture! No better occasion he said (he decides, he is law-unto-himself, on priestly-matters!), no better occasion, he said to himself, 'Everybody HAS to look at me.. I am the Zubin-Mehta for once, here..' and thus thinking, he paused to give a lecture about the sanctity of the knot! Nobody dare 'cross' him... (even other wise, others are able to see the bottom of it... only that the “it” here is the horde of photo-insensitive-team, the video, still people who 'covered' literally too, the whole event !)... But there is a 'mike' who does the job.. So the herd is 'aebal-to-heard' through loudly-espeekar... ! (Those who are not-unable-to-heard-due-to-because-of-since-they-are-unable-to-hear-even.... deaf... are perhaps the only fortunate ones!)... The sermon caught up...!

It so happened, this bride is 'well-built'... might be 80+ (metric-system).. and the dad, on whose laps she is ritualistically supposed to be parked, is a frail old man, manages to hold on to that shaky folding-chair (photo-logistics... the camera man decided the least-visible-equipment)... But one good thing... it is now beyond the dad to shake her off that easily... she is 'engrooved' into awaiting, and the body is just parked like the vacant bogies on a railway siding! )... As if my prayer on behalf of that en-burdened dad got 'heard', somebody whistled... shrill note it was... the priest saar diplomatically melted into a closing chant which rhymes with an end not of 'Jai'.. and the knotty-knot happened soon!

We get 'addicted' to being jostled into crowds each day!... Somebody tried to 'addict-fy' even the resilience of Mumbaikars, when life-happened-as-usual, the next day after a blast, and a few of them revolted!.... (I remember, I asked a commuter of Mumbai local train, 'How do you manage this travel in such a crowded train every day?' ... He smiled philosophically, and said, 'Aadat ho jaata hai .. sab-kuch'... No scope for me to talk about the 'subtle' magic of Maya-Madam, where addiction comes camouflaged, and he is 'engrooved' for ages to come, to allow Maya-Madam, to take up more important things! Now that we are addicted to scam-news... exploitation-news... and mega-addictions.. Maya madam has submitted an application for a long-vacation-leave from her 24 X 7 duties... This time she did not even suggest a 'reliever-substitute'... Addiction is the automated robotic-intelligence-software instead!

( I am perhaps relevant... only as long as I wear 'confusion'... when it is worn too often, and then gets worn off, I too get weary, and then it is time to get engrooved else where!... confusion, evades addiction... so I try to guess... even in movies, the hero's intoxicant-effect seems to evaporate when 'confusion' confronts him!)

Addictively yours,

psn (13th September, 2013)